Explore the most impactful and insightful quotes and sayings by Amy Poehler, and enrich your perspective with the wisdom. Share these inspiring Amy Poehler quotes pictures with your friends on social media platforms such as Facebook, Twitter, or your personal blogs, completely free. Here are the top 379 Amy Poehler quotes for you to read and share.

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Any time you talk to anyone about something that they love, they're, like, their most beautiful. It's a cool gift to get to talk to people about what they love. -- Amy Poehler
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Improvisation is almost like the retarded cousin in the comedy world. We've been trying forever to get improvisation on TV. It's just like stand-up. It's best when it's just left alone. It doesn't translate always on TV. It's best live. -- Amy Poehler
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Being snubbed is not always a bad thing at awards shows because you end up getting a lot of people coming up to you and telling you how great you are. -- Amy Poehler
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I cannot stress enough that the answer to life's questions is often in people's faces. Try putting your iPhones down once in a while, and look in people's faces. People's faces will tell you amazing things. Like if they are angry, or nauseous or asleep. -- Amy Poehler
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Your ability to navigate and tolerate change and its painful uncomfortableness directly correlates to your happiness and general well-being. See what I just did there? I saved you thousands of dollars on self-help books. If you can surf your life rather than plant your feet, you will be happier. -- Amy Poehler
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Aw, I feel bad if [Taylor] was upset. I am a feminist, and she is a young and talented girl. That being said, I do agree I am going to hell. But for other reasons. Mostly boring tax stuff. -- Amy Poehler
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Everyone needs love, never hurt a living thing [and] don't worry about the choices you make because everything will be fun because life is a closet filled with pool toys, -- Amy Poehler
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It's not communism, it's shouldn't be that everybody gets a try no matter how good or bad they are. It's our profession and our art, so we should eventually strive to be working with the best people. -- Amy Poehler
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When you do talk about yourself, or to yourself ... try to picture you talking to your own daughter, or your younger sister. Because you would tell your younger sister or your daughter that she is beautiful, and you wouldn't be lying. Because she is. And so are you. -- Amy Poehler
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People work around you and next to you and the universe waits for the perfect time to whisper in your ear, "Look this way." There is someone in your life right now who may end up being your enemy, your wife, or your boss. Lift up your head and you may notice. -- Amy Poehler
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In my twenties I tried cocaine, which I instantly loved but eventually hated. Cocaine is terrific if you want to hang out with people you don't know very well and play Ping-Pong all night. It's bad for almost everything else. -- Amy Poehler
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Well people love to go dirty and stuff like that. It's funny, because even really dirty things can kind of inspire, but all things inspire really dirty improv and monologues. So then really dirty things can inspire the exact opposite. It's kind of a crapshoot. -- Amy Poehler
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Rooting for other people's failure does get in the way of your success. -- Amy Poehler
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I was happy when we were eventually fired, because I was convinced this Internet thing was a passing fad. This lack of technological foresight is why I am an actor. -- Amy Poehler
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Keep your virginity for as long as you can, until it starts to feel weird to you. Then just get it over with. -- Amy Poehler
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Prince Harry this week toured the Jersey Shore with New Jersey Governor Chris Christie. It was the first meeting between the Prince, of the House of Windsor, and the Governor, of the House of Pancake. -- Amy Poehler
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I don't miss the frustration of youth, the anticipation of love and pain, the paralysis of choices still ahead. The pressure of "What are you going to do?" makes everybody feel like they haven't done anything yet. -- Amy Poehler
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During an interview with Katie Couric Tuesday, Sarah Palin says she is not opposed to gay people, adding 'One of my absolute best friends for the last 30 years happens to be gay and I love her dearly and she doesn't exist.' -- Amy Poehler
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It seems a strange thing, but once I was able to get past that kind of self-image problem, I was able to open up in my comedy work and just go all out, take chances, and have fun with the performance aspect of that. -- Amy Poehler
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He would stand backstage and berate himself if he felt he didn't do a good job. It was almost like he couldn't hear how loud everyone was laughing. -- Amy Poehler
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Bedtime is fraught with fear and disappointment. When it is just me alone with my restless body and mind, I feel like the whole world is asleep and gone. It's very lonely. I am tired of being tired and talking about how tired I am. -- Amy Poehler
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I just want to help other women achieve as much as they can in society without restraints being imposed on us. It's the most natural and normal thing to want to defend your rights to equal opportunities, equal pay for equal work, and everything that comes with that. -- Amy Poehler
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My idea of the perfect exercise class is this: The teacher gives us all a hug and goes, 'You did it! You showed up! Let's lie down.' We all lie down and she's like, 'How is everybody feeling?' We're like, 'Great!' And the teacher's like, 'Great!' Then we all get to leave 20 minutes early. -- Amy Poehler
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Watching great people do what you love is a good way to start learning how to do it yourself. -- Amy Poehler
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I firmly believe that every boy needs his mom to love him and every girl needs her dad to pay attention to her. -- Amy Poehler
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Sometimes painful things can teach us lessons that we didn't think we needed to know. -- Amy Poehler
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We [with Les Charles] started talking about hotel stories, and we found that a lot of the action was happening in the hotel bar. We actually thought of that while we were in a bar: "Why would anyone ever leave here?" -- Amy Poehler
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If you can speak about what you care about to a person you disagree with without denigrating them or insulting them, then you may actually be heard. -- Amy Poehler
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Saying "yes" doesn't mean I don't know how to say no, and saying "please" doesn't mean I am waiting for permission. -- Amy Poehler
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It is no longer unusual for people who choose surrogacy, gay adoption, IVF, international and domestic adoption, fostering, and childlessness to live side by side and quietly judge each other. We can all live in peace thinking our way is the best way and everything else is cuckoo. -- Amy Poehler
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Sometimes this book stays in the present, other times I try to cut myself in half and count the rings. Occasionally I think about the future, but I try to do that sparingly because it usually makes me anxious. -- Amy Poehler
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Going from crying to laughing that fast and hard happens maybe five times in your life and that extreme right turn is the reason why we are alive, and I believe it extends our life by many years. -- Amy Poehler
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The only thing we can depend on in life is that everything changes. The seasons, our partners, what we want and need. -- Amy Poehler
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I used to say that I wanted to make great art with people I love. Now I have an addendum to that goal: to get things on the air. -- Amy Poehler
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I have told people that writing this book has been like brushing away dirt from a fossil. What a load of shit. It has been like hacking away at a freezer with a screwdriver. -- Amy Poehler
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I cried and cried in my Mad Men dress. Jon Hamm held me by the shoulders and looked at me and said, "I know this is very sad, but this is a really important show for me, so I'm going to need you to get your shit together." This made me laugh so hard I think I peed. -- Amy Poehler
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Symmetry is pleasing but not as sexy. Einstein is cool but Picasso knows what I'm talking about. -- Amy Poehler
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As you navigate through the rest of your life, be open to collaboration. Other people and other people's ideas are often better than your own. Find a group of people who challenge and inspire you, spend a lot of time with them, and it will change your life. -- Amy Poehler
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When young girls are encouraged to explore what they find interesting, they grow up to be interesting women. -- Amy Poehler
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Let me offer this apology. Please excuse this self-indulgent preface. I know what I am doing. I am presenting a series of reasons as to why you should lower your expectations, so that you can be blown away by my sneaky insights about life and work. I am a grown woman. I know my own tricks! -- Amy Poehler
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11. If you don't eat pussy, keep walking. -- Amy Poehler
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When you feel scared, hold someone's hand and look into their eyes. And when you feel brave, do the same thing. You are all here because you are smart. And you are brave. And if you add kindness and the ability to change a tire, you almost make up the perfect person. -- Amy Poehler
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I think if I have established anything in my book, it's that a key element of being my friend is being comfortable with my forced fun. -- Amy Poehler
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I also think if you're an actor and you can improvise, when you go on an audition and you can improvise you're just a genius. If you can, you know, take a Tide commercial and you can just say one funny line that's not in the commercial they think you're a genius. -- Amy Poehler
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It can be hard, this life. Beautiful too. -- Amy Poehler
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I have the Angelina Jolie of vaginas. -- Amy Poehler
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Wordsworth also said that the best part of a person's life is "his little, nameless, unremembered, acts of kindness and of love." I -- Amy Poehler
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Remember, your career is a bad boyfriend. It likes you when you don't depend on it. -- Amy Poehler
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Whenever I read stories of people doing huge pranks on set, all I think is, 'These people have too much time on their hands.' Besides, I don't want to make some poor assistant clean up someone's trailer after I've filled it with, say, Cadbury eggs. See? I can't even think of a good prank. -- Amy Poehler
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There's something so romantic about being broke in New York. You gotta do it. You have to live there once without any money, and then you have to live there when you have money. Let me tell you, of the two, the latter is far better. -- Amy Poehler
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Now everything is backed up on the cloud and you can find your phone if you lose it in a taxi. Don't you realize it's only a matter of time before our phones can FIND US? -- Amy Poehler
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If you ever want to see heaven, watch a bunch of young girls play. They are all sweat and skinned knees. Energy and open faces. -- Amy Poehler
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Motherhood was a twenty-four-hour-a-day, all-encompassing job. It was the hardest job I ever had. Everything that happened to you [her child] happened to me. I had once heard children described in a novel as "hostages to fortune" and certainly my happiness depended on yours. -- Amy Poehler
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Our parents surround us with origin stories that create deep grooves in the vinyl records of our lives. -- Amy Poehler
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SLEEP AND I DO NOT HAVE A GOOD RELATIONSHIP. We have never been friends. I am constantly chasing sleep and then pushing it away. -- Amy Poehler
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I'm a moon junky. Every time I look at the moon I feel less alone and less afraid. I tell my boys that moonlight is a magic blanket and the stars above are campfires set by friendly aliens. -- Amy Poehler
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I don't think a man who is fifteen years younger than me should tell me he is proud of me unless he is my sober coach or my time-travel dad. -- Amy Poehler
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I have to say I enjoy physical comedy and I've always loved to kind of take risks. I don't like worrying too much about how I look or how I come across, so that can sometimes ... You know, I like to play those kinds of deluded but fun characters. -- Amy Poehler
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In my high school yearbook I was voted third runner-up for "Most Casual." I never figured out if that meant most casual in dress or in overall manner. In any case, I didn't come in first. I guess the two ahead of me wanted it less. -- Amy Poehler
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When I left SNL, I gave Seth a badge of courage, like Dorothy give to the Cowardly Lion ... He kept it in his pocket during "Update" until he didn't need it anymore. Now it sits in a box on his desk at Late Night. -- Amy Poehler
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Masters of Sex is the degree I got from Boston College. -- Amy Poehler
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Don't treat your heart like an action figure wrapped in plastic and never used. And don't try to give me that nerd argument that your heart is a 'Batman' with a limited-edition silver bat-erang and therefore if it stays in its original packing it increases in value. -- Amy Poehler
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As an actor, you can certainly, at any moment and at any time, discover 400 people who think you're stupid, fat and ugly. -- Amy Poehler
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I get worried for young girls sometimes; I want them to feel that they can be sassy and full and weird and geeky and smart and independent, and not so withered and shriveled. -- Amy Poehler
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One good night's sleep can help you realize that you shouldn't break up with someone, or you are being too hard on your friend, or you actually will win the race or the game or get the job. Sleep helps you win at life. -- Amy Poehler
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I used to get my hair dyed at a place called Big Hair. It cost $15. They just used straight bleach, so my hair was the color of white lined paper, and my eyebrows looked like they were done with a thick black marker. -- Amy Poehler
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Vulnerable people are powerful people. Opening your heart and sharing it means you're going to get so much love in your life. and it's the way to true connection and real purpose and meaning in your life, in my opinion. -- Amy Poehler
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I want to have conversations about real things with people who have experienced real things. I'm tired of talking about movies and gossiping about friends. Life is crunchy and complicated and all the more delicious. -- Amy Poehler
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We have to agree beforehand to divide the funniest lines between us. But Tina [Fey] is so brilliant that I just love every moment working with her and also just hanging out together as friends. -- Amy Poehler
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There's power in looking silly and not caring that you do. -- Amy Poehler
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The things you have done for me - to help me, support me, surprise me, and make me happy - go above and beyond what any person deserves. You are all I need. I love you and I like you. -- Amy Poehler
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Annie taught me that orphanages were a blast and being rich is the only thing that matters. Grease taught me being in a gang is nonstop fun and you need to dress sexier to have any chance of keeping a guy interested. -- Amy Poehler
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I recently hurt myself on a treadmill and it wasn't even on. I was adjusting my speed and stepped wrong and twisted my ankle. I felt a moment of frustration filled with immediate relief. I didn't have to actually work out, but I still got credit for trying. It was a gym snow day. -- Amy Poehler
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It's nice to be short, because people expect less from you. -- Amy Poehler
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I hope and assume that every good comedy writer, no matter the age, has a moment where they discover how great Cheers is. -- Amy Poehler
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Try putting your iPhones down every once in a while and look at people's faces. -- Amy Poehler
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You have to care about your work but not about the result. You have to care about how good you are and how good you feel, but not about how good people think you are or how good people think you look. -- Amy Poehler
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The great thing about taking big chances when you're younger is you have less to lose, and you don't know as much. So you take big swings. -- Amy Poehler
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don't get a Saturday where you can catch up. The sleep -- Amy Poehler
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If you said more than six lines on air you made six hundred dollars, and comedy pieces like "Staring Contest" helped pay my rent. -- Amy Poehler
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You are all so good and I wish I were better. Now get out of here because I want to be where you are. -- Amy Poehler
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While I was at Carlucci I learned how to dust a tiramisu and pair cordials. I learned having a pocket filled with cash is a dangerous thing. I learned that I was getting way too good at a job that was not my life's passion. -- Amy Poehler
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So far the only good things I have seen to come out of this recent technological renaissance are video-chatting with your grandparents, online dating, and being able to attend traffic school on your computer. -- Amy Poehler
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Just breathe. Sometimes you're only a few breaths away from feeling better. -- Amy Poehler
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Finally, thank you, Dolly Parton. Just because. -- Amy Poehler
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Other people are not medicine. -- Amy Poehler
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I ate two waffles, a banana and cereal with blueberries. And that whas between my two breakfasts. -- Amy Poehler
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I don't like crowds because I am small and fear being trampled. My ideal night out is a dinner party in my backyard with a group of like-minded friends whom I boss around in a gentle and loving way. -- Amy Poehler
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Writing can be thankless. People treat writing like it's some elegant act but it's usually lonely and isolating. You will struggle over a piece of writing and then get to set and some dumb actor will say it wrong or immediately want to change it. -- Amy Poehler
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A top McCain policy adviser claimed this week that McCain's work in the Senate helped create the BlackBerry, saying, 'You're looking at the miracle that John McCain helped create.' He then handed the BlackBerry to McCain, who attempted to withdraw $20 from it. -- Amy Poehler
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Please don't drive drunk, okay? Seriously. It's so fucked up. But by all means, walk drunk. That looks hilarious. Everyone loves to watch someone act like they are trying to make it to safety during a hurricane. -- Amy Poehler
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Sometimes we get defensive about what we feel guilty about. -- Amy Poehler
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Emotions are like passing storms, and you have to remind yourself that it won't rain forever. You just have to sit down and watch it pour outside and then peek your head out when it looks dry. -- Amy Poehler
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In a recent Valentine's Day posting on her fan website, Britney Spears says that - oh, who cares? -- Amy Poehler
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Sometimes in my class I have people come in and do monologues inspired by people they know and I always find that to be useful to do specifics about somebody and then you're actually doing a character and not doing some random old lady or something. -- Amy Poehler
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[At Boston College] I started working on the kinds of skills that you need for comedy. It's about being creative and learning to use your gift for being able to let loose and be very unself-conscious. It took me time though before I was really able to get comfortable doing that. -- Amy Poehler
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You could just watch your belly grow bigger and no one would be allowed to ask you about it and you would have your baby and a year later you would allow visitors to finally come and meet your little miracle. -- Amy Poehler
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The federal government began investigating allegations of fraud against the Coalition Provisional Authority, a U.S. contractor accused in a bid-rigging operation involving millions of dollars. Asked to comment, a spokesperson for Halliburton said, 'Millions? With an M? That is adorable.' -- Amy Poehler
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The three things that shorten your life are smoking, artificial sweetener, and violent images. -- Amy Poehler
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Opening your heart and being courageous and telling people that you care about them or like them or that you think they're special only makes you a better, bigger, kinder, softer, more loving person, and only attracts more love into your life. -- Amy Poehler
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Change is the only constant. Learn to surf your life instead of planting your feet. -- Amy Poehler
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During the writers' strike in 2007, we put on our own SNL episode there with old sketches. Michael Cera hosted, our musical guest was Yo La Tengo, and we gave Lorne a birthday cake as he sat in the audience. -- Amy Poehler
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Any painful experience makes you see things differently. It also reminds you of the simple truths that we purposely forget every day or else we would never get out of bed. -- Amy Poehler
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Doing comedy for a living is, in a lot of ways, like a pony and a camel trying to escape from the zoo. It's a ridiculous endeavor and has a low probability of success, but most importantly, it is way easier if you're with a friend. -- Amy Poehler
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Kiss every baby, and pet every dog. Walk slowly, and lie down when you're tired. What's next? -- Amy Poehler
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I had to come to terms with how I saw myself. I had to understand that I wasn't pretty or beautiful like most actresses and that I shouldn't care about whether other people found me attractive or not. -- Amy Poehler
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I should also point out that there is a secret code in each chapter and if you figure it out it unlocks the next level and you get better weapons to fight the zombie quarterbacks on the Pegasus Bridge. So get cracking, you task-oriented monkey brains. -- Amy Poehler
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I don't watch a lot of comedy. For relaxation and escape, I watch shows about how people survive bear attacks. Or old episodes of 'Law and Order,' the Benjamin Bratt/Jerry Orbach era. -- Amy Poehler
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My high school musical did not offer a shirtless Zac Efron but it did provide me with many lessons. I learned that I loved being in a theatre, attending rehearsals, and building sets. I loved listening to the director and groaning about rehearsing choreography -- Amy Poehler
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Fake boobs are weird ya'll" read by Patrick Stewart. -- Amy Poehler
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Tina Fey and I have 15 things in development: 'Laverne and Shirley', 'Starsky and Hutch 3', 'Cagney and Lacey', 'Wonder Twins Activate From Two Hot Broads', 'Little House on the Prairie: The Musical: The Movie'. -- Amy Poehler
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But as my dear friend and relationship sponsor Louis CK has noted, divorce is always good news because no good marriage has ever ended in divorce. -- Amy Poehler
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I am interested in people who swim in the deep end. I want to have conversations about real things with people who have experienced real things. [I'm tired of talking about movies and gossiping about friends.] -- Amy Poehler
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The thing about little babies is that you're always afraid they are going to die. At least in the beginning. You are constantly checking to make sure they didn't die and you haven't killed them. -- Amy Poehler
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You do it because the doing of it is the thing. The doing is the thing. The talking and worrying and thinking is not the thing. -- Amy Poehler
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I get a bit nervous because I just want the show to go well. I think you always have to be a little bit nervous, or else you're a little checked-out, and that's maybe the time when you're not doing your best stuff, because you're kind of just checked-out and falling back on stuff. -- Amy Poehler
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BEN (CONT'D) I am deeply, ridiculously in love with you. Above everything else, I want to be with you, forever. So, Leslie Knope, w - -- Amy Poehler
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I looked around and thought about my life. I felt grateful. I noticed every detail. That is the key to time travel. -- Amy Poehler
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I've been told that I am "better in the room" and prettier in person. -- Amy Poehler
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Is there a word for when you are young and pretending to have lived and loved a thousand lives? Is there a German word for that? Let's say its schaufenfrieglasploit. -- Amy Poehler
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Now on to politics. What's the deal, guys? Seriously. I mean, come on. Get it together. It's like, when are we going to wake up? It's all crazy. Who's with me. Thanks for letting me get that off my chest. -- Amy Poehler
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The friends you meet over forty are really juicy. They are highly emulsified and full of flavor. Now that you're starting to have a sense of who you are, you know better what kind of friend you want and need. -- Amy Poehler
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The eighties were a strange time for teenage fashion. We wore silk blouses and shoulder pads, neon earrings and jodhpur pants. Come to think of it, our pants were especially weird. We also wore stirrup pants, parachute pants, and velvet knickers. It was a real experimental pant time. -- Amy Poehler
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Sexy stuff. We lived on a street called -- Amy Poehler
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During a recent trip to Amsterdam, she sent me a picture of her smoking marijuana for the first time just because I asked her to. -- Amy Poehler
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He was the first important person in my life to die, and when he did, it was the first time I realized that life is not fair or safe or even ours to own. I miss him. -- Amy Poehler
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Make "No." a complete sentence. -- Amy Poehler
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A watched cervix never dilates. -- Amy Poehler
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I am introducing a new idea. Try to care less. Practice ambivalence. Learn to let go of wanting it. -- Amy Poehler
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He handed me a rope and it was up to me whether I would climb it or use it to hang myself. -- Amy Poehler
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When you're a stay-at-home mother you have to pretend it's really boring, but it's not. It's enriching and fulfilling, and an amazing experience. And then when you're a working mother you have to pretend that you feel guilty all day long. -- Amy Poehler
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This kind of job is magic. It comes around once or twice in a lifetime if you're lucky. And thank god, because it's all-consuming and sometimes work should just be work. -- Amy Poehler
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Meryl Streep is not here tonight. She has the flu - and I hear she's amazing in it. -- Amy Poehler
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Back then there was this wonderful thing called "twilight sleep" where women were given anesthesia at the onset of labor and woke up with a baby. Today "twilight sleep" is when you pass out on your bed while looking at paparazzi photos of Robert Pattinson eating an omelet. -- Amy Poehler
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The accent is a really hard thing for me. It reminds me of my family and my childhood, but it's one of the worst-sounding accents out there. I love Boston, but we sound like idiots. -- Amy Poehler
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Sticking up for ourselves in the same way we would one of our friends is a hard but satisfying thing to do. Sometimes it works. -- Amy Poehler
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When you have a comfortable and loving middle-class family, sometimes you yearn for a dance on the edge. This can lead to an overactive imagination, but it is also the reason why kids in Montana do meth. -- Amy Poehler
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People who are committing and taking risks become the king and queen of my prom. -- Amy Poehler
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Life is endings and beginnings. -- Amy Poehler
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PUDDING IS DELICIOUS. -- Amy Poehler
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Stop whining about getting old. It's a privilege. -- Amy Poehler
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We plan on delivering our baby to the soundtrack of Pink Floyd's The Wall while simultaneously watching The Wizard of Oz. If this kid works with us, we guarantee your minds will be blown! The -- Amy Poehler
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You can control time. You can stop it or stretch it or loop it around. You can travel back & forth by living in the moment & paying attention. Time can be your bitch if you just let go of the 'next' & the 'before -- Amy Poehler
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Time moves too slow or too fast. But I know a secret. You can control time. You can stop it or stretch it or loop it around. You can travel back and forth by living in the moment and paying attention. Time can be your bitch if you just let go of the "next" and the "before. -- Amy Poehler
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I grew up watching skating all the time in the Olympic stuff. -- Amy Poehler
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I am old enough now to know I know nothing -- Amy Poehler
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Speaking of music, we will arrive with our own. We plan on delivering our baby to the soundtrack of Pink Floyd's The Wall while simultaneously watching The Wizard of Oz. If this kid works with us, we guarantee your minds will be blown! -- Amy Poehler
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The minute anyone makes you feel weird and non-included or not supported, you know, either beat it or tell them to beat it. -- Amy Poehler
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Your ability to navigate & tolerate change & its painful uncomfortableness directly correlates to your happiness & general well-being -- Amy Poehler
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When I yell at the dads drinking coffee and looking at their phones at the playground while their seven-year-olds play on the preschool monkey bars, I feel like I am fully alive. -- Amy Poehler
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As the old saying goes, Don't ask for permission to sit on George Clooney's lap, beg for forgiveness once you do. -- Amy Poehler
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I'd say any good set or any comedy that I've worked on, that's worked, has been comedians pitching ideas back and forth to each other. A lot of like, 'What if you say this? What about this?' -- Amy Poehler
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Her writing is beautiful and poetic and how dare she. -- Amy Poehler
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I like to do things that challenge me and make me nervous. -- Amy Poehler
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The "yes" comes from my improvisational days and the opportunity that comes with youth, and the "please" comes from the wisdom of knowing that agreeing to do something usually means you aren't doing it alone. -- Amy Poehler
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The earlier you learn that you should focus on what you have, and not obsess about what you don't have, the happier you will be. -- Amy Poehler
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It's easier to be brave when you're not alone. -- Amy Poehler
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New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin said that New Orleans, when rebuilt, will be a chocolate city. And he will be the delicious nut in the center. -- Amy Poehler
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So, if you're doing good longform with talented people than you can step out and you can be the president or a construction worker and people accept that. It's really the roles you give yourself. -- Amy Poehler
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If I have learned anything from hip-hop, it's that there's nothing sexy about a baby that ain't yours. -- Amy Poehler
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It's very hard to have ideas. It's very hard to put yourself out there, it's very hard to be vulnerable, but those people who do that are the dreamers, the thinkers and the creators. They are the magic people of the world. -- Amy Poehler
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Anger and embarrassment are often neighbors. -- Amy Poehler
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Always remember your kid's name. Always remember where you put your kid. Don't let your kid drive until their feet can reach the pedals. Use the right size diapers ... for yourself. And, when in doubt, make funny faces. -- Amy Poehler
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The sleep deprivation after children is so real. I liken it to what it must feel like to walk on the moon and to cry the whole time because you had heard that the moon was supposed to be great but in truth it totally sucks. -- Amy Poehler
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I am a firm believer that every few years one needs to shake one's life through a sieve, like a miner in the Yukon. The gold nuggets remain. The rest falls through like the soft earth it is. -- Amy Poehler
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You aren't allowed to feel special, but no one knows the specific ways you are in pain. -- Amy Poehler
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I think the days of putting your feet up when you're pregnant are long gone. Women who are nine months pregnant now have to work till the bitter end - they don't get to be on TV. -- Amy Poehler
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I wrote it ugly and in pieces. -- Amy Poehler
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Because what else are we going to do? Say no? Say no to an opportunity that may be slightly out of our comfort zone? Quiet our voice because we are worried it is not perfect? I believe great people do things before they are ready. -- Amy Poehler
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I would love to do a serious period drama. Oh, absolutely. I mean, you'll find most comedians want to do more serious stuff, most musicians want to be comedians, and most serious actors want to be musicians. -- Amy Poehler
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It was hard to feel like somebody didn't like me. It felt like such a failure. I don't care as much now. It's really great. It's like I can finally eat spicy food without the gut ache later, or something similar. I have a stomach for other people not stomaching me. Or at least I am working on it. -- Amy Poehler
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I just love bossy women. I could be around them all day. To me, bossy is not a pejorative term at all. It means somebody's passionate and engaged and ambitious and doesn't mind leading. -- Amy Poehler
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Calling people sweetheart makes most people enraged. -- Amy Poehler
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I think we should stop asking people in their twenties what they "want to do" and start asking them what they don't want to do. -- Amy Poehler
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People are very bad and very good. A little love goes a long way. -- Amy Poehler
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I think the hardest thing is to know what you want, ask for it, and then to stop talking. -- Amy Poehler
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It's interesting that people always want to ask me and a lot of working mothers, how do you do it? And it's like well, just like everybody else. It proves it's a bad question. -- Amy Poehler
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Now I just want to sit down and have someone perform my five favorite songs while I eat a light dinner and receive a simultaneous pedicure. -- Amy Poehler
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If your parents are still alive, call them today and ask them to describe the day you were born. Write the details down here, on the following pages. Tell the story every year on your birthday until you know it by heart. -- Amy Poehler
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No one looks stupid when they're having fun. -- Amy Poehler
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A war raged between my jokey and protective brain and my squishy and tender heart. I have realized that mystery is what keeps people away, and I've grown tired of smoke and mirrors. I yearn for the clean, well-lighted place. -- Amy Poehler
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I haven't lived a full enough life to look back on, but I am too old to get by on being pithy and cute. I know enough now to know I know nothing. I am slugging away every day, just like you. -- Amy Poehler
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Believe me, blond hair can take you really far, especially with the older men. It can really distract from the face. I am convinced I could have had sex with both Tony Bennett and John McCain if we weren't each happily married at the time we all met. -- Amy Poehler
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I love you and I like you. -- Amy Poehler
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Decide what your currency is and let go of what you don't have. -- Amy Poehler
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I worked at an ice cream parlor called Chadwicks. We wore old-timey outfits and had to bang a drum, play a kazoo, and sing 'Happy Birthday' to people while giving them free birthday sundaes. Lots of ice cream scooping and $1 tips. -- Amy Poehler
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I asked the indefatigable Betty White what she was going to do when she got home. She told me she was going to fix herself a "vodka on the rocks and eat a cold hot dog." In one sentence, she proved my theory and made me excited for my future. -- Amy Poehler
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I think middle age begins once you start looking forward to eating dinner before six thirty, or when you call the cops when your next-door neighbor has a party. -- Amy Poehler
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Gone are the days when you took Henry James on the train and read it in front of cute guys to impress them. -- Amy Poehler
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I find that, in general, the amount of sharing men do with each other in one year is about the same as what I share with my female friends while we wait for our cars at the valet. -- Amy Poehler
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In the wake of newly-alleged prisoner abuse this week, Senator John McCain said that continued mistreatment of Iraqi prisoners is hurting the nation's image. Also hurting the nation's image: letting people drown when it rains. -- Amy Poehler
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Tall women are attracted to my littleness. I have a lot of tall female friends. They like how I am always looking up to them and I like having the option to jump into their pocket if I want to hide. -- Amy Poehler
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When in doubt, make funny faces. -- Amy Poehler
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It's never overreacting to ask for what you want and need. -- Amy Poehler
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Anybody who doesn't make you feel good, kick them to the curb. And the earlier you start in your life, the better. -- Amy Poehler
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I want to be around people that do things. I don't want to be around people anymore that judge or talk about what people do. I want to be around people that dream and support and do things. -- Amy Poehler
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1. We don't need it to last as long as you think. Hurry up. We are so tired. -- Amy Poehler
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Be yourself! And then tell us about it! And then let's dance! -- Amy Poehler
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We were also performing. We'd give them a list of, like, 'Here's how we want to be introduced' They'd be like, 'Great' And then 5 minutes later they'd come back, 'Bad news: we lost your list. But good news: we've got a trash bag full of weed!' -- Amy Poehler
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I'd already made a decision early on that I would be a plain girl with tons of personality and, accepting it, made a whole lot easier. -- Amy Poehler
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I had already made a decision early on that I would be a plain girl with lots of personality, and accepting it made everything a lot easier. If you are lucky, there is a moment in your life when you have some say as to what your currency is going to be. -- Amy Poehler
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It takes years as a woman to unlearn what you have been taught to be sorry for. It takes years to find your voice and seize your real estate. -- Amy Poehler
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He talks about how the word "no" should be the "end of the discussion, not the beginning of a negotiation. -- Amy Poehler
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You don't have to treat people badly to be on top. -- Amy Poehler
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Sleep is out ... tired is the new black. -- Amy Poehler
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Anyway, this other nurse and I used to jump around in our underwear and kiss each other for fun. Oh wait, what I meant to say was that I answered phones and filed things. -- Amy Poehler
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I was out of the restaurant business but I still had my appetite. I turned toward my future, mouth watering. -- Amy Poehler
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Do work that you are proud of with your talented friends. -- Amy Poehler
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Imagine spreading everything you care about on a blanket and then tossing the whole thing up in the air. The process of divorce is about loading that blanket, throwing it up, watching it all spin, and worrying what stuff will break when it lands. -- Amy Poehler
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When you're betrayed there's a period of shame and then there's always forgiveness. -- Amy Poehler
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I'm going to do 'The Social Network Two: The Electric Boogaloo.' And I have a part in 'Beige Swan.' I'm going to be the lead, but I don't dance. I just do a lot of sitting down. It's too tiring to get up and dance around. That should be coming out in 20-never. -- Amy Poehler
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MTV introduced me to punk music and gay people. -- Amy Poehler
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President Bush threw out the first pitch Monday at Cincinnati's great American ball park. 18 Iraqis were killed. -- Amy Poehler
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Most authors liken the struggle of writing to something mighty and macho, like wrestling a bear. Writing a book is nothing like that. It is a small, slow crawl to the finish line. Honestly, I have moments when I don't even care if anyone reads this book. I just want to finish it. -- Amy Poehler
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Conan O'Brien's show was speaking to a massive and young audience, and he would put us in weekly bits on Late Night. -- Amy Poehler
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You have to be where you are to get where you need to go. -- Amy Poehler
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Decide what your currency is early. Let go of what you will never have. People who do this are happier and sexier. -- Amy Poehler
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I think real life couples on screen are kind of deadly. For the most part, they're kind of deadly. You'd be surprised. Unless they're falling in love onscreen for the first time, you don't have quite the same energy for some reason. -- Amy Poehler
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What I like about all these giant superhero movies is that they speak to the issues that I'm dealing with - working mother and time management and how to be an interesting, sexual, curious woman in your 40s. -- Amy Poehler
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I've said this before, that, when you're in school and you're the class clown, men are really good at making fun at other people and women are really good at making fun of themselves. -- Amy Poehler
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If the goal is doing good stuff and working with your friends ... if you're doing that then you're succeeding. -- Amy Poehler
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An interesting thing about the beginning of our friendship and professional collaboration [with Tina Fey] was that the improve scenes we would do together were basically dramatic and not funny at all. -- Amy Poehler
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Shame is difficult. It's a weapon and a signal. It can paralyze or motivate. My friend Louis CK likes to say that "guilt is an intersection" Getting out of it means making a choice and moving forward. -- Amy Poehler
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No opinion. They're condescending. (on turtles) -- Amy Poehler
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Everyone lies about writing. They lie about how easy it is or how hard it was. They perpetuate a romantic idea that writing is some beautiful experience that takes place in an architectural room filled with leather novels and chai tea. -- Amy Poehler
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Someday you will wake up feeling 51 percent happy and slowly, molecule by molecule, you will feel like yourself again. -- Amy Poehler
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I like the person who commits and goes all in and takes big swings and then maybe fails or looks stupid; who jumps and falls down, rather than the person who points at the person who fell, and laughs. -- Amy Poehler
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The International Olympic Committee was worried people would walk into a one-hundred-seat theater on the corner of Clark and Addison and wonder why no one was jumping over hurdles. The -- Amy Poehler
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I can party like a twenty-four-year-old but it takes me almost a week to recover. -- Amy Poehler
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The scene when Sodapop comes out of the shower in The Outsiders was a very important moment in my adolescence. -- Amy Poehler
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Debbie Downer was one of the few sketches where I broke, and I remember watching Heratio Sanz laugh so hard that tears squirted out of his eyes. I still believe that sketch may be a cure for low-level depression if watched regularly. -- Amy Poehler
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I asked people who have already finished books for advice, which is akin to asking a mother with a four-year-old what childbirth is like. -- Amy Poehler
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If you do a scene and you really like a character in it or a premise in it to write it down and to work on it so that you can have five or six characters that you can pull out in an audition. -- Amy Poehler
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They feed their demon and it gets really strong and then it makes them stay in abusive relationships -- Amy Poehler
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I want to be around people who dream and support and do things. -- Amy Poehler
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Men are very visual, so if you don't want them to notice your stomach, just put fake mustaches on your breasts to distract them. -- Amy Poehler
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Hey Lady I don't want to fuck you husband . -- Amy Poehler
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I love my boys so much I fear my heart will explode. I wonder if this love will crack open my chest and split me in half. It is scary, this love. -- Amy Poehler
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Teenage bodies should be filled with Vonnegut and meatball subs, not opiates that create glassy-eyed party monsters. -- Amy Poehler
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Ang Lee's been nominated for Best Director for Life of Pi, which is what I'm going to call the six weeks after I take this dress off! -- Amy Poehler
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Ignore what other people think. Most people aren't even paying attention to you. -- Amy Poehler
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I like bossy girls. I always have. I like people filled with life. -- Amy Poehler
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I have a boyfriend who knows how to settle me. He puts his hand on my chest and tells me boring stories. On one of our first nights together I woke up apologizing for my snoring and he pulled out two earplugs he had worn to bed so he could hear what I was saying. -- Amy Poehler
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I mean, if my phone is trying to kill me then that crazy X-ray machine at airport security is a straight-up assassin. -- Amy Poehler
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Talented men are not threatened by talented women. They welcome them. And same way with real men. -- Amy Poehler
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President Bush on Monday defended U.S. interrogation of terrorists, saying 'We do not torture.' He added, 'We freedom electrocute.' -- Amy Poehler
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Your brain is not your friend when you need to apologize. Your brain and your ego and your intellect all remind you of the facts. -- Amy Poehler
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I wonder if this love will crack open my chest and split me in half. It's scary, this love. -- Amy Poehler
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I do not improvise in heels. -- Amy Poehler
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Telling me to relax or smile when I'm angry is like bringing a birthday cake into an ape sanctuary. You're just asking to get your nose and genitals bitten off. -- Amy Poehler
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You could always count on Amy to give them a laugh. Though to be fair, it was less a laugh and more of a cackle. The writer Alex Baze described it as the sound one hears when running over a raven's foot with a shopping cart. It is, without exaggeration, one of my favorite sounds on earth. -- Amy Poehler
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Earlier today former Vermont Governor Howard Dean became the new head of the Democratic National Committee
no word on who will be the neck. -- Amy Poehler
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When I had a job catering, I catered a wedding for the Smashing Pumpkins bassist in Indiana. And I served Billy Corgan shrimp off a tray. -- Amy Poehler
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If it's not funny, you don't have to laugh. -- Amy Poehler
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I also love being able to do something that kids and families can enjoy because I have two children of my own and I want them to grow up watching all the fabulous animated movies and cartoons that I loved to watch as a kid. -- Amy Poehler
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Career is something that fools you into thinking you are in control and then takes pleasure in reminding you that you aren't. Career is the thing that will not fill you up and never make you truly whole. -- Amy Poehler
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Try to keep your mind open to possibilities and your mouth closed on matters that you don't know about. Limit your 'always' and your 'nevers.' -- Amy Poehler
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Short people DO NOT like to be picked up. -- Amy Poehler
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You become more attractive when you love yourself. You attract the right things when you have a sense of who you are. -- Amy Poehler
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Writer for Conan, wrote a character for me called Andy's Little Sister. Her name was Stacey and she wore headgear and was obsessed with Conan. -- Amy Poehler
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A new poll reveals that 56% of Americans believe that Wal-Mart is bad for the country, while the other 44% work there. -- Amy Poehler
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Both conservatives and liberals watch 'Parks and Recreation,' and they each think the show is for them, which is really cool. 'SNL' was totally different. It was exciting because everyone was paying attention. Political humor works when people know what you're talking about. -- Amy Poehler
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Girls, if a boy says something that isn't funny, you don't have to laugh. -- Amy Poehler
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If I wanted to see Jonah Hill masturbate at a pool party, I'd go to one of Jonah Hill's pool parties. -- Amy Poehler
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I'd like to think that I don't have a stock character that I go to. I'm lucky in that when you get to initiate your own scene, you get to play whoever you want. That's really kind of cool, but all my characters are short. I look on the videotape, and I thought they were taller, but they're all 5'2. -- Amy Poehler
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Your career and your passion don't always match up. -- Amy Poehler
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When you're doing sketch comedy and you're pregnant, it's like wearing a giant sombrero in every sketch. -- Amy Poehler
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Shame makes people abandon their children and drink themselves to death. It also keeps us from true happiness. An apology is a glorious release. -- Amy Poehler
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I know how good I am at bemoaning my process and pretending I don't care so that my final product will seem totally natural and part of my essence and not something I sweated for months and years. -- Amy Poehler
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And then you just do it. You just dig in and write it. -- Amy Poehler
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Take your risks now; as you become older, you become more fearful and less flexible. And I mean that literally. I hurt my knee this week on the treadmill, and it wasn't even on. -- Amy Poehler
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You put your hand on your heart and feel it beating and decide if what you wrote feels true. -- Amy Poehler
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In conclusion, I invite the media to all grow a pair. And if you can't, I will lend you mine. -- Amy Poehler
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The only way we will survive is by being kind. The only way we can get by in this world is through the help we receive from others. No one can do it alone, no matter how great the machines are. -- Amy Poehler
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Right now I'm singing along to books on tape. I typically pop in something like Stephen King's 'The Stand,' and I love singing along to that kind of stuff. -- Amy Poehler
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Taking risks and making choices is what makes life so exciting. -- Amy Poehler
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Doing what you're afraid of, getting out of your comfort zone, taking risks like that- that's what life is. -- Amy Poehler
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I lived in Chicago for a few years and got a sense of - kind of that broad-shouldered, windy, um, stern, Midwestern, warm-slash-passive aggressive, wonderful - every adjective I can think of, very cold. -- Amy Poehler
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The computer is the new fireplace, everyone in the family gathers around the digital hearth for warmth. -- Amy Poehler
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Her name is Maya Rudolph! She is a goddamn baby champion and she pushed her cuties out Little House on the Prairie style! -- Amy Poehler
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People are their most beautiful when they are laughing, crying, dancing, playing, telling the truth, and being chased in a fun way. -- Amy Poehler
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Sometimes you need to know to quit while you're ahead or at least before things get much worse! -- Amy Poehler
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Acting lets you escape the real world and make out with people you are not married to. It lets you live in the skin of another person and run away from the person you actually are. -- Amy Poehler
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Our ego is a monster that loves to sit at the head of the table, and I have learned that my ego is just as rude and loud and hungry as everyone else's. It doesn't matter how much you get; you are left wanting more. -- Amy Poehler
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I swear, if I could eat my children, I would. I'd consume them like some beast in a Hieronymus Bosch painting, but in a friendlier, more momlike way. Their little bodies make me salivate. It takes everything I have not to swallow them whole. -- Amy Poehler
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The strange thing is that the moment people start looking at you less is when you start being able to see through people more. -- Amy Poehler
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According to Washington insiders, White House Press Secretary Scott McClellan could be the next official to leave the Bush administration. McClellan says he'd like to spend more time lying for his family -- Amy Poehler
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A person's tragedy does not make up their entire life. A story carves deep grooves into our brains each time we tell it. But we aren't one story. We can change our stories. -- Amy Poehler
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I used to have a terrific flat stomach but now it's kind of blown out after two giant babies used it as a short-term apartment. -- Amy Poehler
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Creativity is connected to passion - that light inside that drives you. -- Amy Poehler
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the first thing we do is take our brain out and put it in a drawer. Stick it somewhere and let it tantrum until it wears itself out. -- Amy Poehler
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I was trapped in an awful spiral of insecure narcissism -- Amy Poehler
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How a person treats their waitress is a great indication of their character. -- Amy Poehler
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You can't look stupid if you're having fun. -- Amy Poehler
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The desire to work with Burrows-Charles was really to change NBC's identity, to say, "We want to be in the sophisticated-adult-comedy business." -- Amy Poehler
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Don't think. Get out of your head. Stop planning and just go. -- Amy Poehler
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My inability to keep my shit straight made me straighten out my shit. -- Amy Poehler
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We may all host ourselves to death, and if we're all dead who will host our funerals? -- Amy Poehler
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Young people can remind us to take chances and be angry and stop our patterns. Old people can remind us to laugh more and get focused and make friends with our patterns. -- Amy Poehler
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In the trial of Saddam Hussein on Tuesday, witnesses emotionally testified about the abuse the former dictator inflicted on them. Afterward, a tearful Saddam said, 'Ah, good times.' -- Amy Poehler
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I had no idea how to get guys to notice me. I still don't. Who cares? -- Amy Poehler
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I don't like it when bratty, privileged old white guys speak to me like I am their mouthy niece. -- Amy Poehler
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I am allowed to have healthy self-esteem. -- Amy Poehler
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There's nothing like watching a live performance of, frankly, anything. You have to make sure that people believe everything is improvised. I could not stress enough how little we [actors] prepare and what small amount of time we put in before these shows. -- Amy Poehler
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I've always dreamed of growing up to be Amy Poehler. -- Amy Poehler
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Fighting aging is like the War on Drugs. It's expensive, does more harm than good, and has been proven to never end. -- Amy Poehler
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Nothing is more depressing than a tired dominatrix. -- Amy Poehler
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I have the Angela Jolie of vaginas. -- Amy Poehler
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We stand in the bathroom and look at our face and say, "Stop getting old, face. I command you!" and it doesn't listen. Change is the only constant. Your ability to navigate and tolerate change and its painful uncomfortableness directly correlates to your happiness and general well-being. -- Amy Poehler
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Pretending to not want something can work. Really not caring if you get it takes a lifetime of practice -- Amy Poehler
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There are no promises. Look deeply at joy and sorrow, at laughing and crying, at hoping and fearing, at all that lives and dies. What truly heals is gratitude and tenderness. -- Amy Poehler
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However, if you do start crying in an argument and someone asks why, you can always say, I'm just crying because of how wrong you are. -- Amy Poehler
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I don't remember; I was in a rage haze. Also I was showing off, which can be at the very least embarrassingly transparent and at the very worst -- Amy Poehler
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Listen. Say yes. Live in the moment. Make sure you play with people who have your back. Make big choices early and often. -- Amy Poehler
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Every mother needs a wife. -- Amy Poehler
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I do a weird thing when I am nervous where I tilt my head back like I am super confident. This is my attempt to fake it until I make it, or at the very least make it easier for someone to slit my throat. -- Amy Poehler
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I really do believe that anything in life, any obstacle or challenge, can be made better with humor. -- Amy Poehler
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Feeling invisible means you can float. You can decide to travel without permission. -- Amy Poehler
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Softball was the most fun because of the opportunity to shit talk. -- Amy Poehler
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Because of various security lapses, some senators are calling for a probe of the security at the offices of the Department of Homeland Security. The investigation will be conducted by the Department of Irony. -- Amy Poehler
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I was playing Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz, and it was my turn to speak. Dorothy is Hamlet for girls. -- Amy Poehler
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Figure out what you want. Say it loud. Then shut up, -- Amy Poehler
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Most people I know struggle with that complicated soup of feeling slighted on one hand and like a total fraud on the other. -- Amy Poehler
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I love bossy women. Some people hate the word, and I understand how "bossy" can seem like a shitty way to describe a woman with a determined point of view, but for me, a bossy woman is someone to search out and celebrate. A bossy woman is someone who cares and commits and is a natural leader. -- Amy Poehler
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The physical act of walking combined with the opportunity to look out at the world while you are sharing your thoughts and feelings is very comforting to me. -- Amy Poehler
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Continue to share your heart with people even if it has been broken. -- Amy Poehler
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THE HOLIDAYS ARE RUINED!
This book is one page long and just contains that one sentence. -- Amy Poehler
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I hate Halloween. I hate dressing up. I hate - I wear wigs, makeup, costumes every day. Halloween is like, my least favorite holiday. -- Amy Poehler
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It is time to leave. Oprah has spoken. -- Amy Poehler
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Anyone who has the kind of inventive and inspired comic sensibility to be able to do that kind of work must be pretty talented. -- Amy Poehler
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Some people get in the way of change happening. Some people spend their whole careers thinking they can make a difference. Other people want to do as little as possible to get the day done. -- Amy Poehler
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If you can dance and be free and not embarrassed you can rule the world. -- Amy Poehler
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Fall, and figure out what to do on your way down. -- Amy Poehler
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Be nice, tell your woman she is hot, never shame her, and never hurt her. -- Amy Poehler
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I get a little itchy if I don't have some control. -- Amy Poehler
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watermelon cut in half and it was -- Amy Poehler
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I find my relationships at 40-plus are really emulsified, juicy relationships because you have more of a sense of who you are and who you want to be around. -- Amy Poehler
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Gerthe also talked about travel. She talked about living in Jamaica. She joked about her husband and her haircut, because she is more than the earthquake. A person's tragedy does not make up their entire life. A story carves deep grooves into our brains each time we tell it. But we aren't one story. -- Amy Poehler
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A lot of people don't know I am always thisfuckingclose to doing some crazy shit. -- Amy Poehler
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Sleep helps you win at life. -- Amy Poehler
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Dancing is the great equalizer. It gets people out of their heads and into their bodies. -- Amy Poehler
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It wasn't until I turned thirty that I started to feel like my adult life was beginning. -- Amy Poehler
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You can't stand around and wait to be asked to dance. -- Amy Poehler
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Too often we women try to tackle chaos that is not ours to fix -- Amy Poehler
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I think going from laughing to crying to laughing to crying - making those quick turns adds years to your life. -- Amy Poehler
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I know enough now to know I know nothing. -- Amy Poehler
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Instead of asking students to "declare their major" we should ask students to "list what they will do anything to avoid". It just makes a lot more sense. -- Amy Poehler
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The Gift of Fear. -- Amy Poehler
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IN 1997, I PROUDLY DECLARED I WOULD NEVER OWN A CELL PHONE. -- Amy Poehler
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The more I time-travel the more I learn I am always just where I need to be. -- Amy Poehler
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If boys say something that's not funny, you don't have to laugh. -- Amy Poehler
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Even demons gotta sleep. -- Amy Poehler
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older also helps you develop X-ray vision. -- Amy Poehler
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It's important to know when it's time to turn in your kazoo. -- Amy Poehler
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Everybody is interesting when they are interested in something. -- Amy Poehler
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You deserve love and you'll get it. -- Amy Poehler
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Forgiveness is something that's always possibility. -- Amy Poehler
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I know enough to know I know nothing. -- Amy Poehler
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Always remember your kid's name, -- Amy Poehler
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What is more nerve-racking: live comedy or the World Series. SNL -- Amy Poehler
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I like hard work and I don't like pretending things are perfect. -- Amy Poehler
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Dreams never wear you down. -- Amy Poehler
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I don't like disappointing people. Some would say that this is "codependent behavior", which I have discovered is a term that explains how most everyone acts all the time, unless one is a sociopath or a Russian computer that plays chess. -- Amy Poehler
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Nobody looks stupid when they are having fun. -- Amy Poehler
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Is difficult. It's a weapon and a signal. It can paralyze or motivate. My -- Amy Poehler
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Only at the Golden Globes do the beautiful people of film rub shoulders with the rat-faced people in television -- Amy Poehler
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The lessons? Women are mighty. George Clooney loves bits. Doing something is often more fun than doing it alone. And you don't always have to win to get the pudding. -- Amy Poehler
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I have withdrawal pains about not getting to work the people (on the show). -- Amy Poehler
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If you don't eat pussy, keep walking. -- Amy Poehler
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You learn early as an actor that creating your own material is the only way to have any control. -- Amy Poehler
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The creation of the UCB Theatre is by far my proudest professional accomplishment. -- Amy Poehler
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Any actor or actress that tells you that they don't watch their stuff is lying. -- Amy Poehler
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The truth is, writing is this: hard and boring and occasionally great but usually not. -- Amy Poehler
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I was the daughter of teachers, so school was always very important. I liked it. -- Amy Poehler
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Because remember, the talking about the thing isn't the thing. The doing of the thing is the thing. -- Amy Poehler
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When you host a show you have to hopefully be funny at the top and set the tone for a really fun evening. -- Amy Poehler
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The French have launched their own version of Google, called Quaero. You just type in the subject you're interested in, and Quaero refuses to look it up for you. -- Amy Poehler
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Go back to the Dalai Lama. He says, I think technology has really increased human ability. But technology cannot produce compassion. -- Amy Poehler
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That is the motto women should constantly repeat over and over again. Good for her! Not for me. -- Amy Poehler