Explore the most impactful and insightful quotes and sayings by Douglas Coupland, and enrich your perspective with the wisdom. Share these inspiring Douglas Coupland quotes pictures with your friends on social media platforms such as Facebook, Twitter, or your personal blogs, completely free. Here are the top 587 Douglas Coupland quotes for you to read and share.

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Being asked what animal you'd like to be is a trick question; you're already an animal. -- Douglas Coupland
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I think as a species we're not designed to be able to think more than one year into the future - if that. Even trying to imagine one year from now makes most people feel like they've been given a huge boring chunk of homework that's too hard to do. -- Douglas Coupland
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TV is all about hair. And then skin. And then clothing. And then it's about your voice. And finally the report, what you're actually saying. And 99 times out of 100, it never gets past the hair. -- Douglas Coupland
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A rich man is always simply a rich man, but a rich woman is only a poor woman who just happens to have money. -- Douglas Coupland
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Life is boring. People are vengeful. Good things always end. We do so many things and we don't know why, and if we do find out why, it's decades later and knowing why doesn't matter any more. -- Douglas Coupland
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If I don't learn something new every year, I go crazy. -- Douglas Coupland
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I had been feeling permanently on the cusp of a flu, feeling at that point where I just wanted to borrow somebody else's coat- borrow somebody else's life- their aura. I seemed to have lost the ability to create any more aura on my own. -- Douglas Coupland
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I'm not a hoarder, I'm a collector: if you have something you like, every time you see it, you have a little happy hit. -- Douglas Coupland
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I find people who prejudge reality TV to be annoying. Art comes from anywhere. Culture can ooze out of any crack. Prejudging is the death of creativity. -- Douglas Coupland
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You could return to that same hive a thousand years later and there would be just the same perception of tomorrow as never being any different. Humans are completely different. We assume tomorrow is another world. -- Douglas Coupland
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The sixties are like a theme park to them. They wear the costume, buy their tickets, and they have the experience. -- Douglas Coupland
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I build my life so that I don't wake up for anything. Ever. If you make me get up early to do something with you, I will hate you and resent you and figure out a way of never having to work with you ever again. -- Douglas Coupland
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People who advocate simplicity have money in the bank; the money came first, not the simplicity. -- Douglas Coupland
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I think that emotions affect you as much as x-rays and vitamins and car crashes. -- Douglas Coupland
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Whatever happened to books? Suddenly everybody's talking about these 100-hour movies called 'Breaking Bad'. People are talking about TV the same way they used to talk about novels back in the 1980s. I like to think I hang out with some pretty smart people, but all they talk about is 'Breaking Bad.' -- Douglas Coupland
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Salad bars are like a restaurant's lungs. They soak up the impurities and bacteria in the environment, leaving you with much cleaner air to enjoy. -- Douglas Coupland
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Strange how when you're young you have no memories ... Then one day you wake up and BOOM, memories overpower all else in your life, forever making the present moment seem sad and unable to compete with a glorious past that now has a life of its own. -- Douglas Coupland
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Flying dreams mean that you're doing the right thing with your life. -- Douglas Coupland
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People are pretty forgiving when it comes to other people's families. The only family that ever horrifies you is your own. -- Douglas Coupland
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Chronocanine Envy:
Sadness experienced when one realized that, unlike one's dog, one cannot live only in the present tense. As Kierkegaard said, Life must be lived forward. -- Douglas Coupland
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What exactly is it that humans do that is specifically human? There has to be something. How odd it is for billions of people to be alive, yet not one of them is really quite sure of what makes people people. -- Douglas Coupland
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You know, I think the people I feel saddest for are the ones who once knew what profoundness was, but who lost or became numb to the sensation of wonder, who felt their emotions floating away and just didn't care. I guess that's what's scariest: not caring about the loss. -- Douglas Coupland
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BRAZILIFICATION:The widening gulf between the rich and the poor and the accompanying disappearance of the middle classes. -- Douglas Coupland
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Nothing very, very good and nothing very, very bad ever lasts for very very long. -- Douglas Coupland
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Face it: You're always just a breath away from a job in telemarketing. -- Douglas Coupland
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Sometimes it feels as if everything in life is just
something we haul into the grave. -- Douglas Coupland
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Americans are a quarter of a billion people who have almost nothing in common except for the fact they've been told they have lots in common. -- Douglas Coupland
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It's not healthy to live life as a succession of isolated little cool moments. -- Douglas Coupland
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Forget about being world famous, it's hard enough just getting the automatic doors at the supermarket to acknowledge our existence. -- Douglas Coupland
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Gore is nature's way of saying, There are too many human beings on the planet, and I'm trying to rectify this any way I can. SARS didn't work, but trust me, I'm cooking up something better. In the interim, please kill lots of yourselves. -- Douglas Coupland
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My secret is that I need God - that I am sick and can no longer make it alone. I need God to help me give, because I no longer seem to be capable of giving; to help me be kind, as I no longer seem capable of kindness; to help me love, as I seem beyond being able to love. -- Douglas Coupland
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Try not thinking of peeling an orange. Try not imagining the juice running down your fingers, the soft inner part of the peel. The smell. Try and you can't. The brain doesn't process negatives. -- Douglas Coupland
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It was a December night so cold and clear that the air felt like the air of the Moon - lung-burning; mentholated and pure -- Douglas Coupland
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Is there anything in the world more annoyingly creepy than an unspoken dress code? -- Douglas Coupland
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Do you remember how you felt at seventeen? I do and I don't ( ... ) Imagine you came from outer space and someone showed you a butterfly and a caterpillar. Would you ever put the two of them together? That's me and my memories. -- Douglas Coupland
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SAFETY NET-ISM: The belief that there will always be a financial and emotional safety net to buffer life's hurts. Usually parents. -- Douglas Coupland
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NOSTALGIA IS A WEAPON -- Douglas Coupland
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How can we be alive and not wonder about the stories we knit together this place we call the world? Without stories our universe is merely rocks and clouds and lava and blackness. It's a village scraped raw by warm waters leaving not a trace of what existed before. -- Douglas Coupland
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With Google I'm starting to burn out on knowing the answer to everything. People in the year 2020 are going to be nostalgic for the sensation of feeling clueless. -- Douglas Coupland
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I think that in the future, clocks won't say three o'clock anymore. They'll just get right to the point and rename three o'clock 'Pepsi.' -- Douglas Coupland
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How did society ever function without you, little Sharpies? Your nibs have the precise amount of give to create a line quality with character, yet not so much character as to be smushy. Thank you, little pens. -- Douglas Coupland
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If you have a great idea, you should be able to communicate it as well. It's like the sound of one hand clapping. You have a great idea but aren't able to express it - well, how great was the idea? -- Douglas Coupland
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Humans are part of nature, and nature is one great big wood chipper. Sooner or later, everything shoots out the other end in a spray of blood, bones, and hair. -- Douglas Coupland
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After playing Halo 2 for 3 hours, I went out and mowed down a Red Cross blood bank, raped anything with a pulse, and trashed the local mall. Then I toasted the gods of destruction with a goblet of blood stolen from a Girl Guide's body. -- Douglas Coupland
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In the future, torture will once again become the recreational sport of the rich. -- Douglas Coupland
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Life is so expensive. -- Douglas Coupland
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Lottery tickets are a surtax on desperation. -- Douglas Coupland
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I miss my pre-Internet brain, but that doesn't help anything. We can only go forward. -- Douglas Coupland
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The harder you try to become the opposite of your parents, the more quickly you become them. -- Douglas Coupland
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Los Angelenos dress like they've been focus-grouped. -- Douglas Coupland
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When you see such photos, you can't help but wonder at just how sweet and sad and innocent all moments of life are rendered by the tripping of a camera's shutter, for at that point the future is still unknown and has yet to hurt us, and also for that brief moment, our poses are accepted as honest. -- Douglas Coupland
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Once you see someone lose it, you can never look at them the same way again. -- Douglas Coupland
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She thought about her life and how lost she'd felt for most of it. She thought about the way that all truths she'd been taught to consider valuable invariably conflicted with the world as it was actually lived. How could a person be so utterly lost, yet remain living? -- Douglas Coupland
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Workshops and seminars are basically financial speed dating for clueless people. -- Douglas Coupland
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What is the search for the next great compelling application but a search for the human identity? -- Douglas Coupland
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Mediums change you by their very existence. They do this on fundamental levels because they force you to favour certain parts of your brain over others. -- Douglas Coupland
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Knee-Jerk Irony: The tendency to make flippant ironic comments as a reflexive matter of course in everyday conversation. -- Douglas Coupland
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[...] we started talking more about all of the fiftysomethings being dumped out of the economy by downsizing. No one knows what to do with these people, and it's so sad, because being 50 nowadays isn't like being 50 a hundred years ago when you'd probably be dead. -- Douglas Coupland
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I like being surrounded by good ideas. Every single time you walk past something you like, you get a blast of happy chemicals to the brain, and I like that. -- Douglas Coupland
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And I think back over my own life and I realize that my own nature-the core me-essentially hasn't changed all these years. When I wake up in the morning, for those first few moments before I remember where I am or when I am, I still feel that same way I did when I woke up at the age of five. -- Douglas Coupland
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Venice Beach: proof of the biological impossibility of imagining a person being simultaneously good-looking and poor. -- Douglas Coupland
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I was always the youngest person in class, skinny, scrawny, no good at sports. I asserted myself by being smart. But then I got to college and started to get C's and D's. That was fantastic. I no longer had to be the smartest person in the room. -- Douglas Coupland
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If someone decides to be a musician now, it means because there is no hope of money at the end of it, it means they really want to be a musician. And if someone is writing now, there is no hope for money at the end of it. -- Douglas Coupland
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You don't believe magic is possible in lives lived within traditional boundaries. -- Douglas Coupland
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Headwise, I always kind of knew that everyone goes grey in our family very early - and I was like, it works for me. I started growing my beard, and it changes the shape of your skull and your face, and I started seeing my mother's side of the family in myself for the first time. -- Douglas Coupland
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Jason once told me that eye contact is the most intimacy two people can have
forget sex
because the optic nerve is technically an extension of the brain, and when two people look into each other's eyes, it's brain-to-brain. -- Douglas Coupland
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Unhappiness is something we are never taught about; we are taught to expect happiness, but never a Plan B to use to use when the happiness doesn't arrive. -- Douglas Coupland
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I always thought of words as art supplies. -- Douglas Coupland
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God is what keeps us together after the love is gone. -- Douglas Coupland
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Aliens didn't come down to Earth and give us technology. We invented it ourselves. Therefore it can never be alienating; it can only be an expression of our humanity. -- Douglas Coupland
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I used the phrase 'a certain age.' What I mean by this is the age people are in their heads. It's usually thirty to thirty-four. Nobody is forty in their head. When it comes to your internal age, chin wattles and relentless liver spots mean nothing. -- Douglas Coupland
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If you have an impulse to kindness, act on it. -- Douglas Coupland
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Your ability to rationalize your own bad deeds makes you believe that the whole world is as amoral as you are. -- Douglas Coupland
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The more you want something to happen, the harder it becomes. -- Douglas Coupland
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There is no shame in impulse. -- Douglas Coupland
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I once read that for every person currently alive on earth, there are nineteen dead people who have lived before us. That's not that much really. Our existence as a species on earth has been so short. We forget that. -- Douglas Coupland
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I have to say, 'Pod' was a bon-bon, a treat to myself. A treat to write: a happy, pleasurable write. -- Douglas Coupland
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Time perception is very much about how you sequence your activities, how many activities you layer overtop of others, and the types of gaps, if any, you leave in between activities. -- Douglas Coupland
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PERSONALITY TITHE: A price paid for becoming a couple; previously amusing human beings become boring: 'Thanks for inviting us, but Noreen and I are going to look at flatware catalogs tonight. Afterward we're going to watch the shopping channel. -- Douglas Coupland
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My brain is built of paths and slides and ladders and lasers and i have invited all of you to enter its pavilion. my brain, as you enter, will smell of tangerines and brand-new running shoes. -- Douglas Coupland
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It was pivotal in making you but you don't remember it. Or do you? Do we understand the events that make us who we are? Do we understand the factors that make us do the things we do? -- Douglas Coupland
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I don't think human beings were meant to know so much about the world. All this time and all this
exposure to every conceivable aspect of life - wisdom so rarely enters the picture. We barely have enough time to figure out who we are and then
we become bitter and isolated as we age. -- Douglas Coupland
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[...] it would have been an affront to all good souls who had worked for a better world over the millennia not to engineer a system for preserving finer thoughts after the millennium arrived and all ideologies died and people became animals once more. -- Douglas Coupland
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This is not ambition. This is desperation. -- Douglas Coupland
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The capacity for not feeling lonely can carry a very real price, that of feeling nothing at all. -- Douglas Coupland
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The best thing about being young is being stupid. Or rather, the best thing about being young is being too stupid to know how stupid you really are. -- Douglas Coupland
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I hate math. It's hard, it's stupid, and it's nature's way of separating spinsters from women who end up breeding. -- Douglas Coupland
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I'm a visual thinker. Research tells us that only 20 per cent of people think visually. So what about the other 80 per cent? Don't they think in pictures? I mean if you imagine washing and preparing potatoes you visualise the process, right? -- Douglas Coupland
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Always keep your mouth shut with a drunk. You can never win with piss tanks. The most you can hope for is to break even. -- Douglas Coupland
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My arm draped her shoulder; we both felt safe, as if we were a complete solar system unto ourselves, dangling in the sky, warm heated planets inside a universe of stars.
-Richard -- Douglas Coupland
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Ethan and I drove around Silicon Valley today looking at various company parking lots to see whose workers are working on a Sunday. He says that's the surest way to tell which company to invest in. If the techies aren't grinding, the stock ain't climbing. -- Douglas Coupland
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Maybe the more emotions a person experiences in their daily lives, the longer time seems to feel to them. As you get older, you experience fewer new things, and so time seems to go by faster. -- Douglas Coupland
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I've become a day writer: most people start as night writers, and I used to be, but something happened to my endocrine system. I do miss the 3 A.M. writing jags. -- Douglas Coupland
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My brain feels like a cool, deep lake. -- Douglas Coupland
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I am aware that there is a world out there that functions without regard to me. There are wars and budgets and bombings and vast dimensions of wealth and greed and ambition and corruption. And yet I don't feel a part of that world, and I wouldn't know how to join if I tried. -- Douglas Coupland
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Failure is authentic, and because it's authentic, it's real and genuine, and because of that, it's a pure state of being. -- Douglas Coupland
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People will always choose more money over more sex. -- Douglas Coupland
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A good piece of technology dreams of the day when it will be replaced by a newer piece of technology. This is one definition of progress. -- Douglas Coupland
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I was so beautiful when I was young. And I took so few photos because I felt so skinny and ugly. I wish I'd just taken a few more shots. -- Douglas Coupland
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You spend a much larger part of your life being old, not young. Rules change along the way. The first things to go are those things you thought were eternal. -- Douglas Coupland
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I think most people either forget or don't know that Microsoft only hires people with I.Q.'s well over 130. -- Douglas Coupland
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I think that every reader on earth has a list of cherished books as unique as their fingerprints ... I think that, as you age, you tend to gravitate towards the classics, but those aren't the books that give you the same sort of hope for the world that a cherished book does. -- Douglas Coupland
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I find it hard to believe that human beings are the crowning achievement of life on earth. Something better than us has to come along. -- Douglas Coupland
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With 'Worst. Person. Ever.' I knew where it started and where it had to end, but I threw Raymond as many curveballs as I could along the way. He's like the coyote in the 'Road Runner' cartoons. -- Douglas Coupland
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I don't think I see the world in terms of stupid or clever, but in terms of being able to get irony. There's some awful statistic about only 20 per cent of Americans being able to understand irony. -- Douglas Coupland
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I'd change you bandages for you, but you don't have any and that's a big issue here. -- Douglas Coupland
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All events became omens; I lost the ability to take anything literally. -- Douglas Coupland
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The heart of a man is like deep water -- Douglas Coupland
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But Dag, for all of his efforts, might as well have been talking to a cat. Our parents' generation seems neither able nor interested in understanding how marketers exploit them. They take shopping at face value. -- Douglas Coupland
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In Canada, we're happy to provide a safe haven for next-door neighbors in the middle of a marital dispute. And if anyone trips while crossing the border, we're happy to set their broken bones for free. -- Douglas Coupland
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When you get an e-mail and reply to the sender, you simply obliterate everything they sent you and then, in small square brackets, write: [deletia] It stands for everything that's been lost. -- Douglas Coupland
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Telling people they look relaxed makes them look relaxed. -- Douglas Coupland
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As brothers and sister we knew instinctively that if we were going to stand in darkness, best we stand in a darkness we had made ourselves. -- Douglas Coupland
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I sandpapered the roof of my mouth with 3 bowls of Cap'n Crunch - had raw gobbets of mouth-beef dangling onto my tongue all day -- Douglas Coupland
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Susan, nonetheless, wanted to know why she was having such a dating problem. Dusty said, I think your problem is that you think everyone else is a freak except you, but everybody's a freak- you included- and once you learn that, the World of Dating is yours. -- Douglas Coupland
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We want our idols to be dead because it makes death a much less scary place. -- Douglas Coupland
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I think money is due for some sort of collapse. People are going to realize that money has a half-life, like radioactive elements. -- Douglas Coupland
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Exposing hypocrisy doesn't make you a moral person -- Douglas Coupland
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Sometimes I think God is like weather - you may not like
the weather, but it has nothing to do with you. You just happen to be there. Deal with it. Sadness
and grief are part of being human and always will be. -- Douglas Coupland
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I seriously wish that he had spent his entire childhood being serially arse-raped by teachers, scoutmasters, members of the clergy, relatives, policemen, doctors, door-to-door salesmen and all registered sex offenders within a 500-mile radius of his unprotected bedroom. -- Douglas Coupland
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Fashionable people can opt out of the fashion stream, but a stylish person never becomes unstylish unless they hit their head on a rock and suffer brain damage. -- Douglas Coupland
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A bland smile is like a green light at an intersection, it feels good when you get one, but you forget it the moment you're past it. -- Douglas Coupland
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The politician will be only too happy to abdicate in favor of his image, because the image will be so much more powerful than he will ever be. -- Douglas Coupland
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The reason the future feels odd is because of its unpredictability. If the future didn't feel weirdly unexpected, then something would be wrong. -- Douglas Coupland
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I had a lot of really terrible advice early in my writing career and I cheesed off people without even knowing it, all the while thinking I was implementing good advice. -- Douglas Coupland
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It's so hard to balance in our minds the knowledge that 'the world' is mundanely 'a planet.' The former is so holy; the latter merely a science project. -- Douglas Coupland
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I've had maybe 20 jobs, big and small, and I've never hated any of them. At the same time, the moment the learning curve flattened, I was out of there. -- Douglas Coupland
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Figure out what it is in life you don't do well, and then don't do it. -- Douglas Coupland
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The bland politician's smile of someone who knows that the bodies in the car trunk are, indeed, dead. -- Douglas Coupland
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Yet how often is it that we are rescued by a stranger, if ever at all? And how is it that our lives can become drained of the possibility of forgiveness and kindness - so drained that even one small act of mercy becomes a potent lifelong memory? How do our lives reach these points? -- Douglas Coupland
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This place is like some cosmic dream crusher. All you can get out of a place like this is a creepy little tingle that lets you know your kid is never going to be anything more than a customer-that the whole world is being turned into casino. -- Douglas Coupland
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I grew up in airports and on air bases. I know what flying and airports can be. And most airports make me feel like we're about three per cent better than ants. Especially U.S. airports. They're zoos. All civility is gone. -- Douglas Coupland
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The Internet has destroyed irony in the world, or at least wounded it considerably. What are we to do about an invention whose end result is that starving people in China are looking up things on marthastewart? -- Douglas Coupland
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One of the biggest indicators for success in life is having a few crazy relatives. So long as you get only some of the crazy genes, you don't end up crazy; you merely end up different. And it's that difference that gives you an edge, that makes you successfull. -- Douglas Coupland
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Death without the possibility of ever changing the world is the same as a life that never was. -- Douglas Coupland
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I think God is how you deal with everything that's out of your own control. -- Douglas Coupland
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Blame is just a lazy person's way of making sense of chaos. -- Douglas Coupland
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You keep waiting for the moral of your life to become obvious, but it never does. Work, work, work: No moral. No plot. No eureka! Just production schedules and days. You might as well be living inside a photocopier. Your lives are all they're ever going to be. -- Douglas Coupland
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I've never gone on Facebook or MySpace. -- Douglas Coupland
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I tried to think of a witty play on Every picture tells a thousand words, but then the whole word/picture thing collapsed on me. -- Douglas Coupland
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I can't switch time zones any more. London is one of my favourite places, but I'm always so zonked that I can't appreciate it. It's like a six-inch sheet of glass between me and Charing Cross Road. -- Douglas Coupland
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Some people think fashion is frivolous but it's not ... it's just that some ideas come and go quickly, and that's the nature of the language of fashion. -- Douglas Coupland
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The world is a glorious place, and filled with so many unexpected moments that I'd get lumps in my throat, as though I were watching a bride walk down the aisle - moments as eternal and full of love as the lifting of veils, the saying of vows and the moment of the first wedded kiss. -- Douglas Coupland
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North America can easily fragment quickly as did the Eastern Bloc in 1989. -- Douglas Coupland
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Well, it's amazing what you can find in this world if you're willing to sleep with people. -- Douglas Coupland
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I saw doves and I thought they were rocks, but they were asleep. My breath made them stir, and they rocks took flight, the earth exploding ... and my only thought was that I wanted you to see them, too. -- Douglas Coupland
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At least there's nothing scary about him and hopefully he doesn't see anything scary in me. We go way back, to summer camp. We KNOW each other. People I don't know just make me want to say YIKES! I'll take history over mystery any day of the week. -- Douglas Coupland
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Letting go of randomness is one of the hardest decisions a person can make. -- Douglas Coupland
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The Vienna Franks are a good example of urban white acid folk revivalism crossed with ska. -- Douglas Coupland
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I know it's not cat food, but what exactly is it that they put inside of tinned ravioli? -- Douglas Coupland
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What is prayer but a wish for the events in your life to string together to form a story
something that makes some sense of events you know have meaning. -- Douglas Coupland
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Wow. Whoops. Sorry ... I just lost two hours inside a YouTube kitten warp. -- Douglas Coupland
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As far as I can see, Janet, life is just an endless banquet of loss, and each time a new loss is doled out, you have to move your mental furniture around, throw things out, and by then there's more loss, and the cycle goes on and on. (All Families are Psychotic.) -- Douglas Coupland
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Some day you cross this thin line and you really realize that we need to protect ourselves from ourselves. -- Douglas Coupland
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Art was always my main focus; I fell into writing by accident in the 1980s, writing magazine articles to pay for my studio. I have to put myself into the position of writing; sometimes it doesn't work, and sometimes it works great. -- Douglas Coupland
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In periods of rapid personal change, we pass through life as though we are spellcast. We speak in sentences that end before finishing. We sleep heavily because we need to ask so many questions as we dream alone. We bump into others and feel bashful at recognizing souls so similar to ourselves. -- Douglas Coupland
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Lonely people want to be dead, yet we're still not quite ready to go - we don't want to miss the action; we want to see who wins next year's Academy Awards. -- Douglas Coupland
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Fate is for losers. -- Douglas Coupland
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the BIG issue nowadays is that on TV and in magazines, the images we see, while they appear surreal, "really aren't surrealistic, because they're just random, and there's no subconsciousness underneath to generate the images. -- Douglas Coupland
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I have always liked the idea of Superman because I have always liked the idea that there is one person in the world who doesn't do bad things. And that there is one person in the world who is able to fly. -- Douglas Coupland
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Life always kills you in the end, but first it prevents you from getting what you want. -- Douglas Coupland
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It'd be preposterous for me to propose a universal cure to loneliness but I will say that people who do the things they find interesting, either creatively or vocationally, tend to become unlonely very quickly. -- Douglas Coupland
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At what point in our lives do we stop blurring? When do we become crisp individuals? What must we do in order to end these fuzzy identities - to clarify just who it is we really are?
-Richard -- Douglas Coupland
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Never loan a book to someone if you expect to get it back. Loaning books is the same as giving them away. -- Douglas Coupland
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Jason said, "Yes. Gerard T. Giraffe."
What does the 'T' stand for?"
'The. -- Douglas Coupland
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I used to care about how other people thought I led my life. But lately I've realized that most people are too preoccupied with their own lives to give anybody else even the scantiest of thoughts. -- Douglas Coupland
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Self-delusion is one of the funniest things there is. -- Douglas Coupland
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Anna-Louise leans over and whispers in my ear. "This is so surreal," she says, "I think I'm turning into a melting clock. -- Douglas Coupland
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When future archaeologists dig up the remains of California, they're going to find all of those gyms their scary-looking gym equipment, and they're going to assume that we were a culture obsessed with torture. -- Douglas Coupland
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There's much to be said for feeling numb. Time passes more quickly. You eat less, and because numbness encourages laziness, you do fewer things, good or bad, and the world's probably a better place for it. -- Douglas Coupland
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I like having a beard. My beard changes my face shape and allows me to see in it family members who I love and can't see otherwise. -- Douglas Coupland
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LET'S JUST HOPE WE ACCIDENTALLY BUILD GOD. -- Douglas Coupland
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Dreams don't come true. Dreams die. Dreams get compromised. Dreams end up dealing meth in a booth at the back of the Olive Garden. Dreams choke to death on bay leaves. Dreams get spleen cancer. -- Douglas Coupland
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You wait for fate to bring about the changes in life which you should be bringing about yourself. -- Douglas Coupland
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It's a cliche, but true, that writing is intensely solitary and at times really lonely. I sit in one room and talk to squirrels and blue jays all day. -- Douglas Coupland
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I don't remember where I was before I was born, why should I be worried about where I go after I die? -- Douglas Coupland
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Too much free time is certainly a monkey's paw in disguise. Most people can't handle a structureless life. -- Douglas Coupland
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The neighborhood I grew up in had this fence that surrounds the watershed. And if you go on the other side of that fence, there's nothing until the North Pole and down to Siberia. It's the absolute cutoff point between man and nature. -- Douglas Coupland
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I'm always looking for things that are so incredibly present that they become invisible. -- Douglas Coupland
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I kind of wonder if creativity is all morphing into one big thing that's not even art, but something universal and bigger. -- Douglas Coupland
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If your life had lyrics, would they be any good? -- Douglas Coupland
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[ ... ] and after those big strokes, what's to tell? We run out of things that make us individual very quickly; all of us have far more in common than we do not have in common. -- Douglas Coupland
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Clowns drink to blot out the ravages of terrifying children for a living. -- Douglas Coupland
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Most guys have about 73 calories of shopping energy, and once these calories are gone, they're gone for the day - if not the week - and can't be regenerated simply by having an Orange Julius at the Food Fair. -- Douglas Coupland
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Tofu hot dogs are actually scarier than real hot dogs. It's like wanting the worst possible meat product without even the thrill of it actually being meat. -- Douglas Coupland
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I realized that once people are broken in certain ways they can't ever be fixed, and this is something nobody ever tells you when you are young and it never fails to surprise you as you grow older as you see the people in your life break one by one. -- Douglas Coupland
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Here's what I think: the five most
unattractive traits in people are cheapness, clinginess, neediness, unwillingness to change and
jealousy. Jealousy is the worst, and by far the hardest to conceal. -- Douglas Coupland
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Cloning is great. If God made the original, then making copies should be fine. -- Douglas Coupland
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Instead of feeling sexy and tingly, it felt useless, like recycling plastics or registering to vote. -- Douglas Coupland
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It's weird when people start sentences with 'frankly' - as if their other sentences don't count. -- Douglas Coupland
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What is human behavior, except trying to prove that we're not animals? -- Douglas Coupland
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How can I be a part of the 1960s generation when I don't even remember any of it? -- Douglas Coupland
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I think that to acknowledge a new generation is to acknowledge some degree of obsolescence in yourself, and that is very hard to do and often comes with undeniable anger. -- Douglas Coupland
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I miss the reference section at the library. I used to go there twice a week on missions. Now everywhere's a research library and I can't get an elitist kick from it any more. -- Douglas Coupland
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A man in a bookstore buys a book on loneliness and every woman in the store hits on him. A woman buys a book on loneliness and the store clears out. -- Douglas Coupland
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Beyond a certain age, sincerity ceases to feel pornographic. -- Douglas Coupland
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If a building looks better under construction than it does when finished, then it's a failure. -- Douglas Coupland
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So I came down here, to breathe dust and walk with the dogs-- to look at a rock or a cactus and know that I am the first person to see that cactus and that rock. -- Douglas Coupland
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The thing about living in the 21st century is you can get to fortysomething and not have anyone major in your life die. -- Douglas Coupland
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I will say that my days are spent solitary and somewhat lost in thought, and every single time I inadvertently wear my shirt inside out in public, I bump into my sister-in-law at the grocery store. -- Douglas Coupland
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Compromise is said to be the way of the world and yet I find myself feeling sick trying to accept what it has done to me. -- Douglas Coupland
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Back in the late 1970's, when I was fifteen years old, I spent every penny I then had in the bank to fly across the continent in a 747 jet to Brandon, Manitoba, deep in the Canadian prairies, to witness a total eclipse of the sun. -- Douglas Coupland
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When you think about Twitter and you think what a dumb stupid throwaway technology, and then you have the Iranian elections and it actually saves the day - you can't prejudge technologies now because they have effects you may not have intended. -- Douglas Coupland
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MID-TWENTIES BREAKDOWN: A period of mental collapse occurring in one's twenties, often caused by an inability to function outside of school or structured environments coupled with a realization of one's essential aloneness in the world. Often marks induction into the ritual of pharmaceutical usage. -- Douglas Coupland
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I began doing writing projects and art and design projects to explore a new way of seeing Canada. Roots is one more way of continuing this exploration. I want to present a wide-open Canadian sense of color, adventure, communication and openness that defines our country. -- Douglas Coupland
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It's sort of a law of the art world: The stuff that grows in importance is only the stuff you bought because it wowed you. -- Douglas Coupland
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When the world throws you too much information, the only way you can stay sane or survive is to look for pattern recognition. Amidst all the blurs, is there a constellation that emerges, is there a straight line that's emerging? -- Douglas Coupland
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By your thirties, you should be doing whatever it is you're supposed to be doing with your life and just get on with it - which is what I suppose happened with me as much as to anyone else. -- Douglas Coupland
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I would like to fall in love again but my only hope is that love doesn't happen to me so often after this. I don't want to get so used to falling in love that i get curious to experience something more extreme - whatever that may be. -- Douglas Coupland
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You pretend to be more eccentric than you actually are because you worry you are an interchangeable cog. -- Douglas Coupland
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And his computer's spell-check always forces him to capitalize the word "Internet". Come on; World War Two earned it's capitalization. The Internet just sucks human beings away from reality. -- Douglas Coupland
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As you grow older, it becomes harder to feel 100 percent happy; you learn all the things that can go wrong, you become superstitious about tempting fate, about bringing disaster upon your life by accidentally feeling too good one day. -- Douglas Coupland
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Canadian winters are long. Life is hard and so is ice. -- Douglas Coupland
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I've given up wanting to make a killing or be a bigshot. I just want to find happiness and maybe open up a little roadside cafe in Idaho. -- Douglas Coupland
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It had been drilled into us that to feel fear is to not fully trust God. Whoever made that up has never been beneath a cafeteria table with a tiny thread of someone else's blood trickling onto their leg. -- Douglas Coupland
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Dag insists that all dogs secretly speak the English language and subscribe to the morals and beliefs of the Unitarian church ... -- Douglas Coupland
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I say 'Uhmm...' a lot. I mentioned this to Karla and she says it's a CPU word. It means you're assembling data in your head - spooling. -- Douglas Coupland
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She went crazy with a calm face,
justifiably so. -- Douglas Coupland
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It's very strange that most people don't care if their knowledge of their family history only goes back three generations. -- Douglas Coupland
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For whatever reason, I tend to get reporters who are maybe in the middle of intense therapy, and they turn what's supposed to be a professional interview into therapy for themselves. -- Douglas Coupland
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Star Trek characters never go shopping. -- Douglas Coupland
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Do you ever just want to take your car out onto the highway and gun the engine as fast
as you can and then close your eyes and see what happens? -- Douglas Coupland
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We threw chew toys to Misty, Mom's golden retriever that she bought two years ago secondhand. Misty was supposed to be a seeing-eye dog, but she failed her exam because she's too affectionate. It's a flaw we don't mind. -- Douglas Coupland
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I worship teachers. They can't be paid enough. It depresses me that society sees them as somehow expendable. -- Douglas Coupland
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The real killers in the business world aren't the ones who aim for the top, it's the ones who aim for two notches below the top. -- Douglas Coupland
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Before machines the only form of entertainment people really had was relationships. -- Douglas Coupland
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Starved for affection, terrified of abandonment, I began to wonder if sex was really just an excuse to look deeply into another human being's eyes. -- Douglas Coupland
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All systems have failed me. In five
minutes I'll be fine again for a while, but right now the inside of my head feels like Niagara
Falls without the noise, just this mist and churning and no real sense of where earth ends and
heaven begins. -- Douglas Coupland
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How many of us have a love so true it spans eternity? A purity of need so clear it can remain strong in the face of all that the world throws at us? This
is Karen Ann McNeil, the woman who fell to Earth, the woman for whom the people in her life never gave up waiting. -- Douglas Coupland
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Their talk was endless, compulsive, and indulgent, sometimes sounding like the remains of the English language after having been hashed over by nuclear war survivors for a few hundred years. -- Douglas Coupland
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Ray, don't get mad just because I say yes to life. I like to keep myself available to the universe, because it brings me wisdom. Maybe you don't just want me to soar. -- Douglas Coupland
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Vaccinated Time Travel: To fantasize about traveling backward in time, but only with proper vaccinations. -- Douglas Coupland
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My father has never once asked me a question, any question. There's a freedom that came from that. It allowed me to create my own way of thinking. -- Douglas Coupland
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When you write, it's just a much more crystalline, compressed version of the voice you think with - though not the one you speak with. I think your writing voice is your laser-guided missile. It's the poetry part of you. -- Douglas Coupland
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Fun fact: The United Nations building in New York City is the only place in all of North America where smoking is still permitted indoors. -- Douglas Coupland
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Big companies are like marching bands. Even if half the band is playing random notes, it still sounds kind of like music. The concealment of failure is built into them. -- Douglas Coupland
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And we had just invented the first of a set of what I would call fusion entities - characters, that could only exist when the two of us were
together -- Douglas Coupland
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If cats were double the size they are now, they'd probably be illegal. -- Douglas Coupland
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Books arrive in my head all at once, and then it becomes an 18-month process of getting it all down on paper. -- Douglas Coupland
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I am by now completely convinced that my downfall in life is going to be my inability to achieve computer nirvana like a true hacker or hackette. I think this lacking is the most unmodern facet of my personality - the career equivalent of having six fingers, or a vestigial tail. -- Douglas Coupland
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We are a dreadful species indeed, and deserve whatever it is our techno-baubles do to us. -- Douglas Coupland
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And any small moments of intense, flaring beauty such as this morning's will be utterly forgotten, dissolved by time like a super-8 film left out in the rain, without sound, and quickly replaced by thousands of silently growing trees. -- Douglas Coupland
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Could I ever be a Craig? No. A person must be born into Craigdom, with its multiple ski holidays, complex orthodontia, proper nutrition and casual, healthy view of recreational sex. My -- Douglas Coupland
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If God drives a car, He'd drive a 1973 Ford LTD Brougham sedan with a claret-colored vinyl roof, with oxblood leather upholstery and an opera window. -- Douglas Coupland
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I keep vampire hours, going to bed at 2 A.M. and waking up at about 10:30-11 A.M. -- Douglas Coupland
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... "Holy crap!" Rachel wondered what it was about extreme disaster that made people invoke both religion and excrement - bookends to mark the polarities of human condition? -- Douglas Coupland
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I'm suspicious of places that look decorated. I can understand why people do it, but you see too many cushions or a piece of fabric hanging and it's, like, 'Ugh!' A good house with good art will always work, no matter what. -- Douglas Coupland
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What I remember is the silence in spite of the noise. In my head it
might just as well have been a snowy day in the country. -- Douglas Coupland
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I love working out how things are made, which is why I have so many models of towers. -- Douglas Coupland
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I believe that you've had most of your important memories by the time you're thirty. After that, memory becomes water overflowing into an already full cup. -- Douglas Coupland
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You fear that if you lower your guard for even one second your whole world will disintegrate into chaos -- Douglas Coupland
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You can't fake creativity, competence, or sexual arousal. -- Douglas Coupland
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So much information lacks a good way to store it, especially when it's all digital; sometimes it requires old technology to go back and retrieve it. -- Douglas Coupland
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The Sugar Frosted Nutsack is fantastic. It's volcanic and sexy and utterly unlike anything I've read before. It feels like the future in a dazzling way that has nothing to do with looking backward. It's been a long wait for a new novel from Mark Leyner, but worth it. Ten out of ten from me. -- Douglas Coupland
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Rick, I'm holding a do-I-give-a-shit-ometer in my hand, and the needle's not moving. Shut up. -- Douglas Coupland
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I like doing radio because it's so intimate. The moment people hear your voice, you're inside there heads, not only that, you're in there laying eggs. -- Douglas Coupland
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Negative? Moi? I think realistic might be a better word. You mean to tell me we can drive all the way here from L.A. and see maybe ten thousand square miles of shopping malls, and you don't have maybe just the weentsiest inkling that something, somewhere has gone very very cuckoo? -- Douglas Coupland
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Money isn't money anymore. Time doesn't feel like time anymore. Your sense of community, it's evaporated, too, or it's turned into something you visit at 2 A.M. on a website. -- Douglas Coupland
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Everyone has a special place they store their tension (I'm on shiatsu duty), the same way everyone misspells the same words over and over. Karla stores her tension in her rhomboid muscles, and I remove it. This is making me feel good. That I can do this. -- Douglas Coupland
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Destiny is what we work toward. The future doesn't exist yet. Fate is for losers! -- Douglas Coupland
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If you don't change, then what's the point of anything happening to you? It'll still be happening to an unchanged person. -- Douglas Coupland
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There used to be a tradition of the loveable rogue who would steal from the honour boxes in churches and buy a round of drinks with the money he snagged. And everyone would find him tremendously good company. But not any more. -- Douglas Coupland
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Here's my theory about meetings and life: the three things you can't fake are erections, competence and creativity. -- Douglas Coupland
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We are changed souls; we don't look at things the same way anymore. For there was a time when we expected the worst. But then the worst happened, did it not? And so we will never be surprised again. -- Douglas Coupland
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So where do you start when you want to start your life again? -- Douglas Coupland
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Nearly all of the Nobodies he saw were men. Women, he thought, had so many more ways to connect themselves to the world
children, families, friends. -- Douglas Coupland
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Could the situation be that we no longer believe in that particular place? Or maybe we were all promised Heaven in our lifetimes, and what we ended up with can't help but suffer in comparison. -- Douglas Coupland
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On TV people look at your hair and then they look at your skin, and then they look at your clothes, and by the time they're listening to what you're saying, you're off the screen. -- Douglas Coupland
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In the same way you can never go backward to a slower computer, you can never go backward to a lessened state of connectedness. -- Douglas Coupland
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If you don't have a spiritual practice in place when times are good, you can't expect to suddenly develop one during a moment of crisis. -- Douglas Coupland
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HISTORICAL SLUMMING: the act of visiting locations such as diners, smokestack industrial sites, rural villageslocations where time appears to have been frozen many years backso as to experience relief when one returns back to'the present'. -- Douglas Coupland
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People don't have dominion over Nature. it's gone beyond that. Human beings and the world are now the same thing. The future and whatever happens to you after you die - it's all melted together. Death isn't the escape hatch the way it used to be. -- Douglas Coupland
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Claire put scientifically enhanced popcorn in the microwave oven. "I never feel like I'm putting food in one of these things," she then says, entering with beeps, the time-set into the LED. "It feels more like I'm inserting fuel rods into a core. -- Douglas Coupland
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I've never really seen too much difference between writing or making visual art or designing furniture or clothing. It's still my brain - I'm just using different parts of it for different things. -- Douglas Coupland
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TV didn't kill radio, it just added something new to the mix. -- Douglas Coupland
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How cruel that mankind was forced to conform to the global electronic experience. But all other options had vanished. There no longer existed a country to escape to ("country" - also, what a quaint notion) where people read books and had lives that became stories. -- Douglas Coupland
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It also allows you to look as though you're not particularly from the present, future or past, either. -- Douglas Coupland
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Jason's father, Reg, always said "Love what God loves and hate what God hates," but more often than not I had the impression that he really meant "Love what Reg loves and hate what Reg hates. -- Douglas Coupland
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Most time capsules, when they're unearthed, are really awful. There's nothing good in them. -- Douglas Coupland
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Once you've used your brain flat-out, you can't go into the SLOW mode. You can't drive an Infinite J-3B and then get downgraded to an Daewoo. Brains don't workd that way. -- Douglas Coupland
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I miss the silliness of the Nineties. What would society be like if 9/11 never happened? If that silliness was extended forever? -- Douglas Coupland
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When I look at my daily schedule, I feel like a trout flopping about on a dock, drowning in the air. Some people are ruthless with their schedules. Not me. I wing it. -- Douglas Coupland
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I felt like I was walking on an airport's rubber conveyor belt. -- Douglas Coupland
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The best part of my life is gone, and what remains is whizzing past so quickly I feel like I'm Krazy-Glue'ed onto a mechanical bull of a time machine. -- Douglas Coupland
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In our heads we're all about 33 years old. -- Douglas Coupland
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I think, there are people for whom freedom is a bigger, more important thing than stability. -- Douglas Coupland
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A ring is a halo on your finger. -- Douglas Coupland
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You are paralyzed by the fact that cruelty is often amusing. -- Douglas Coupland
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I really do force myself to not be fully engaged with all the technology at once, just because I have an addictive personality and I get too into it. -- Douglas Coupland
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As a form of escapism, yearning for the 20th century is understandable, but in practice it would be horrible - sort of like going on a holiday promising yourself you could go without the Internet, only to crumble and walk in a daze to the local Internet cafe to gorge on connectivity. -- Douglas Coupland
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Sometimes you accidentally input an extra digit into the year: i.e, 19993 and you add 18,000 years on to *now*, and you realize that the year 19993 will one day exist and that time is a scary thing, indeed. -- Douglas Coupland
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At meetings you have to explain what you've accomplished, so naturally you fluff up your work a bit, like pillows on a couch. -- Douglas Coupland
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Christmas makes everything twice as sad. -- Douglas Coupland
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If you want to get close to somebody, you have to tell him or her something intimate about yourself. They'll tell you something intimate in return, and if you keep this going, maybe you'll end up in love. -- Douglas Coupland
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The Internet has made me very casual with a level of omniscience that was unthinkable a decade ago. I now wonder if God gets bored knowing the answer to everything. -- Douglas Coupland
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We're rapidly approaching a world comprised entirely of jail and shopping. -- Douglas Coupland
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Data transmission is no longer something scary you don't want in your backyard. Now you want it directly in front of your house. -- Douglas Coupland
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Fashion only seems to make sense if it's rooted in some dimension of history or if it feels like a continuation of an idea. -- Douglas Coupland
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Abe: Wise hermit cast adrift on asteroid for thousands of years; has developed odd code languages for everyday actions; lonely but not bitter; his heart is cryogenically frozen, and he must search the universe pursuing the Thawer. -- Douglas Coupland
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I think of how the person who needs the other person the least in a relationship is the stronger member. -- Douglas Coupland
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I'm going to see Princess Mononoke tonight at the Ridge - and you're coming with me. -- Douglas Coupland
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I don't understand the human heart. Only pain makes it grow stronger. Only sorrow makes it kind. Contentment makes it wither, and joy seems to build walls around it. -- Douglas Coupland
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Only pain makes it grow stronger. One sorrow makes it kind. Contentment makes it wither, and joy seems to build walls around it. The heart is perverse, and it is cruel. I hate the heart and seems to hate me. -- Douglas Coupland
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To acknowledge God is to fully accept the sorrow of the human condition. -- Douglas Coupland
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He knew that the fuel his brain craved could only be found in a proper university. -- Douglas Coupland
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You know what the best thing is about the end of the day? Tomorrow, it starts all over again. -- Douglas Coupland
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He felt intact but worthless, like a chocolate rabbit selling for 75 percent off the month after Easter. -- Douglas Coupland
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Below a certain point, if you keep too quiet, people no longer see you as thoughtful or deep; they simply forget you. -- Douglas Coupland
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The advent of cellphones may, in the end, be no more relevant than the ability of laptops to change our written documents into ones using cool new fonts. -- Douglas Coupland
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I wondered what it was to pray, because it was something I have never learned to do, and all I remember is falling. -- Douglas Coupland
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I was at Emily Carr College of Art and Design in Vancouver for four years, and I loved it. -- Douglas Coupland
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Writing is largely about time, while visual art is largely about space. -- Douglas Coupland
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We live in an era with no historical precedents. History is no longer useful as a tool in helping us understand current changes. -- Douglas Coupland
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Who wants to talk on the phone? If you want to talk to me, text me. Or if we must, let's meet in person. -- Douglas Coupland
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In my mind, I've always checked out in 2037; that's always been my expiration date. I'll be 75. -- Douglas Coupland
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It's like male geeks don't know how to deal with real live women, so they just assume it's a user interface problem. Not their fault. They'll just wait for the next version to come out- something more user friendly. -- Douglas Coupland
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It's fun to sentimentalize the 20th-century lifestyle and the 20th-century brain, but it helps nobody, it makes you look ancient, there's no going back, and you'd be miserable if you did. -- Douglas Coupland
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Nostalgia for the 20th century brain helps nobody. -- Douglas Coupland
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Much of what we now consider 'personality' will be explained away as structural and chemical functions of the brain. -- Douglas Coupland
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Later, I would learn that coincidences are the most planned things in the world. Later, I would learn that every single moment is a coincidence. -- Douglas Coupland
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But in that one little window of time, many lasting
decisions were made. First, any love for my father that might have remained either in my
mother's heart or my own - vaporized. Second, we knew for sure that Dad was unfixably nuts. -- Douglas Coupland
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It's just amazing how hard it is for people to change, even when amazing things happen. It almost reinforces who you are instead of making you change. -- Douglas Coupland
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Jesus, Neal, watching you eat with a spork is like seeing Helen Keller at a ladies' afternoon tea. -- Douglas Coupland
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For there was once a time when we expected the worst. But then the worst happened, did it not? And so we will never be surprised ever again. -- Douglas Coupland
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New York is a theme park for people with IQs over 108. -- Douglas Coupland
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The 1990s felt like the 1990s in a real and good way. -- Douglas Coupland
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Leslie entered the lounge like a taller, studlier version of the Kentucky Fried Chicken colonel. -- Douglas Coupland
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I tend to look for pathologies everywhere. -- Douglas Coupland
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When you crop the photo, you tell a lie. -- Douglas Coupland
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To have a healthy culture, you have to have stable health care financing and stable arts financing and stable sports financing, and if you don't have that, your culture becomes a parking lot. -- Douglas Coupland
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You can get a subjective and highly factual dossier on most anyone in the public realm almost instantly. It's why publishers don't worry about author photos any more; people just Google a person and get on with things. -- Douglas Coupland
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I've always felt like an alien trapped in a human form. We all do at some time or other; for me it's a permanent state, and I'm still unsure if Earth is a penance or a reward. -- Douglas Coupland
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Fondue sets, martini shakers and juicing machines: three things the world could live completely without. -- Douglas Coupland
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My question about luging is, How do you get into the luge community to begin with? Is it one day like, 'Mom, Dad, I really want to luge.' And your parents are like: 'O.K., I'll quit my job. We'll move to an Alpine community.' -- Douglas Coupland
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CONSENSUS TERRORISM:The process that decides in- office attitudes and behavior. -- Douglas Coupland
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The past is a finite resource. -- Douglas Coupland
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Our achievements may make us interesting, Tyler, but our darkness makes us lovable. -- Douglas Coupland
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Adventure without risk is Disneyland. -- Douglas Coupland
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Most of us have only two or three genuinely interesting moments in our lives; the rest is filler. -- Douglas Coupland
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I want to see books taken out of historical time and placed into a different timeline, such as evolutionary or geological time, as a means of putting the human experience in context. -- Douglas Coupland
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He'd probably no more view his life as a story than he would view his life that of a sea cucumber. -- Douglas Coupland
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Wilcox Fate is for losers. -- Douglas Coupland
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Loneliness is my curse---our species' curse---it's the gun that shoots the bullets that make us dance on a saloon floor and humiliate ourselves in front of strangers. -- Douglas Coupland
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I'm not patient - and I'm getting more impatient as I get older - but I am disciplined about writing, and I want that on my tombstone: 'He wasn't patient, but he was disciplined.' -- Douglas Coupland
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I like the present. I'm always interested in new ideas, and what's happening. I'm not nostalgic. -- Douglas Coupland
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I didn't realize then that so much of being adult is reconciling ourselves with the awkwardness and strangeness of our own feelings. Youth is the time of life lived for some imaginary audience -- Douglas Coupland
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And for a while they were happy in their own manner; they had the animal confidence money affords. -- Douglas Coupland
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A vast percentage of the human race is literally not wired neurologically to get irony. Well more than half of humanity takes life at face value, which is to me terrifying. -- Douglas Coupland
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My Google existence is probably larger than a lot of people's. -- Douglas Coupland
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Brennan remembers a Nortel recruiting truck showing up at a Newbridge mass termination meeting at the local hockey arena and offers this practical advice: "If all the meeting rooms are booked at the same time, it means something's up." By "something," he means firings. -- Douglas Coupland
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And then I though about us ... these children who fell down life's cartoon holes ... dreamless children, alive but not living
we emerged on the other side of the cartoon holes fully awake and discovered we were whole. -- Douglas Coupland
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If you waste five minutes of time a day, over the course of a year that adds up to one full work day. Think of five wasted minutes as a slow-release holiday drug. Savour it. -- Douglas Coupland
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TV and the Internet are good because they keep stupid people from spending too much time out in public. -- Douglas Coupland
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Please stop putting quotes from Nietzsche at the end of your emails. Five years ago you were laughing your guts out over American Pie 2. What - suddenly you've magically turned into Noam Chomsky? -- Douglas Coupland
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Collecting and hoarding seem to be about the loss of others, while philanthropy and de-accessioning are more about the impending loss of self. (Whoever dies with the most toys actually loses.) -- Douglas Coupland
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Your body isn't just a body. It's an ecosystem. -- Douglas Coupland
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I curled myself into a ball and cried quietly, doing that thing that only young people can do, namely, feeling sorry for myself. Once you're past thirty you lose that ability; instead of feeling sorry for yourself you turn bitter. -- Douglas Coupland
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And in your new lives you'll have to live entirely for that one sensation-that of imminent truth. And you're going to have to holler for it, steal for it, beg for it-and you're never to stop asking questions about it twenty-four hours a day, the rest of your life. -- Douglas Coupland
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I think the killers get far too much attention. -- Douglas Coupland
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Purchased experiences don't count. -- Douglas Coupland
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Your brain forms roughly 10,000 new cells every day, but unless they hook up to preexisting cells with strong memories, they die. Serves them right. -- Douglas Coupland
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Every human being you see in the course of a day has a problem that's sucking up at least 70 percent of his or her radar. -- Douglas Coupland
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You can never become rich unless you like rich people. -- Douglas Coupland
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The future and eternity are two entirely different things. -- Douglas Coupland
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All families are psychotic. Everybody has basically the same family - it's just reconfigured slightly different from one to the next. -- Douglas Coupland
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The whole Silicon Valley is oxymoronic - geeky and rich and hip. -- Douglas Coupland
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We are all of us born with a letter inside us, and that only if we are true to ourselves, may we be allowed to read it before we die. -- Douglas Coupland
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We instinctively wave to people on trains because trains are a metaphor for being alive: countless souls, trapped together, hurtling across the landscape, with a destination somewhere in the unseeable distance.
Nobody ever waves at buses. -- Douglas Coupland
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Human beings are the only animal that thinks they change who they are simply by moving to a different place. Birds migrate, but it's not quite the same thing. -- Douglas Coupland
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And I wondered then, how do we ever know what beauty lies inside of people, and the strange ways this world works to lure that beauty outward? -- Douglas Coupland
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What if God exists except it turns out he doesn't really like people very much? -- Douglas Coupland
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Everybody has basically the same family, it's just reconfigured slightly differently from one to the next. -- Douglas Coupland
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My life is neither a disaster nor supernatural, yet it is an unlikely event. -- Douglas Coupland
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Thinking you're immortal is weirdly similar to being immortal. -- Douglas Coupland
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Forget sex or politics or religion, loneliness is the subject that clears out a room. -- Douglas Coupland
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Make your goals big and broad enough so that they never become answered prayers and boomerang to curse you. -- Douglas Coupland
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Once you establish a look, and once everybody recognizes that look as your look, you never have to think about fashion again. -- Douglas Coupland
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I was sick of wanting money. I was sick of being without a goal. -- Douglas Coupland
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Happy. And then I got afraid that it would vanish as quickly as it came. That it was accidental
that I didn't deserve it. It's like this very, very nice car crash that never ends. -- Douglas Coupland
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Do you realize, Tyler,' says Anna-Louise, 'the entire time we were in the forest it rained steadily and not once did we approach a state of moistness? There was a storm and we didn't even know. -- Douglas Coupland
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Most people have no idea how to politely answer a phone. The English do, and it's been their only major business advantage for the past two centuries. -- Douglas Coupland
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If somebody wants to run for office, they had better to explain why they want to run for office. Wanting to be a candidate seems, in itself, reason for exclusion. -- Douglas Coupland
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The things worth writing about, and the things worth reading about, are the things that feel almost beyond description at the start and are, because of that, frightening. -- Douglas Coupland
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Given the infinite number of coincidences that could happen, very few ever actually do. The universe exists in a coincidence-hating state of anti-fluke. -- Douglas Coupland
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You're right, a spleen is a strange thing-we technically don't need one, but maybe spleens are kept in our bodies in case we mutate or evolve, and if we grow wings or tentacles we need to have the spleen in place in order for them to work. -- Douglas Coupland
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The belief that tomorrow is a different place from today is certainly a unique hallmark of our species. -- Douglas Coupland
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Unhappy endings are just as important as happy endings. They're an efficient way of transmitting vital Darwinian information. Your brain needs them to make maps of the world, maps that let you know what sorts of people and situations to avoid. -- Douglas Coupland
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When hit with a genius idea, people tend to say, "Well, if I sat down in a chair and really thought about it, I could have had that genius idea, too." But they didn't
and even if they'd wanted to, it could never have happened. -- Douglas Coupland
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In the spirit of Ethan's neurosis, we made a drywall list of keyboard buttons we would like to see: PLEASE, THANK YOU, FUCK OFF, DIE, OOPS ... MY MISTAKE, DO SOMETHING COOL AND SURPRISE ME . -- Douglas Coupland
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ETHNOMAGNETISM: The tendency of young people to live in emotionally demonstrative, more unrestrained ethnic neighborhoods: 'You wouldn't understand it there, mother-they hug where I live now.' -- Douglas Coupland
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The whole point of Gen X was, and continues to be, a negation of being forced into Baby Boomerdom against one's will. -- Douglas Coupland
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After my brush with the suicidal impulse, I listen with new ears to others when they
speak on the subject. I think there are people who were born with that little door open, and they
have to go through life knowing that they might jump through it at any moment. -- Douglas Coupland
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We lost money at church bingos and ate catfish deep-fried in lard. -- Douglas Coupland
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Speaking of the information superhighway, we have all given each other official permission to administer a beating to whoever uses that accursed term. We're so sick of it! -- Douglas Coupland
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The only way to the top is killing and greed. Okay, I'm kidding. But killing helps. -- Douglas Coupland
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Marketing is essentially about feeding the poop back to diners fast enough to make them think they're still getting real food. -- Douglas Coupland
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If he'd learned one thing while he'd been away, it was that loneliness is the most taboo subject in the world. Forget sex or politics or religion. Or even failure. Loneliness is what clears out a room. -- Douglas Coupland
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I'd take a helicopter up and throw microwave ovens down on the Taco Bell. -- Douglas Coupland
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Lists only spell out the things that can be taken away from us by moths and rust and thieves. If something is valuable, don't put it in a list. Don't even say the words. -- Douglas Coupland
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I don't think anyone ever gets over anything in life; they merely get used to it. -- Douglas Coupland
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We were never supposed to live until 40. We were built to self-destruct at 30, whether from cancer or mental illness. We're all going way beyond our expiration date. -- Douglas Coupland
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Besides, animals don't even have time. Only humans have time. It's what makes us different. -- Douglas Coupland
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We sleep heavily because we need to ask so many questions as we dream alone. -- Douglas Coupland
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The urge to reincarnate while still alive is near universal. -- Douglas Coupland
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Why do most of us make such boring choices for the stories of our lives? -- Douglas Coupland
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When Donald Duck traded his wings for arms, was he trading up or trading down? -- Douglas Coupland
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Everyone wants to share what he or she has learned with someone who really cares. -- Douglas Coupland
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I think writing would have happened to me anyway, somehow. Differently, but it still would have happened. -- Douglas Coupland
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It's around midnight. After I left Dad, my choice was to either become very drunk or write this. I
chose to write this. It felt kind of now-or-never for me. -- Douglas Coupland
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I ma trying to feel more well adjusted than I really am, which is, I guess, the human condition. -- Douglas Coupland
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As I'm never going to be old, I'm glad that I never lost my sense of wonder about the world, although I have a hunch it would have happened pretty soon. I loved the world, its beauty and bigness as well as its smallness. -- Douglas Coupland
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I go to the gym three days a week. You have to or else - I don't want to be the guy that dies shoveling snow. -- Douglas Coupland
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Depression is when you have lots of love, but no one's taking. -- Douglas Coupland
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If you're not a tree hugger, then you're a what, a tree hater? -- Douglas Coupland
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Storytelling is ultimately a creative act of pattern recognition. Through characters, plot and setting, a writer creates places where previously invisible truths become visible. Or the storyteller posits a series of dots that the reader can connect. -- Douglas Coupland
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Sometimes I wonder if the world is too interesting and too boring at the same time. -- Douglas Coupland
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The one thing about my life that's different from others is that I wake up for no one, and for some reason, that's just good for your creativity. -- Douglas Coupland
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The less of a life, the more mail you need -- Douglas Coupland
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Making eye contact with adults while dressed as a clown is risky. -- Douglas Coupland
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In my ears i hear a noise, and this noise is the sound of the color of the sun. -- Douglas Coupland
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It's hard to get mad at Neal, because he suffers from a medical condition called total fucking stupidity. -- Douglas Coupland
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Actually, it's not the impertinence I'm punishing him for, it's that he let other people know what he wanted. -- Douglas Coupland
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People say if you're doing an art project, that's different from a book, but I honestly don't see it. I try and try, and I just don't. -- Douglas Coupland
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It's amazing how you can be a total shithead, and yet your soul still wants to hang out with you. -- Douglas Coupland
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The modern economy isn't about the redistribution of wealth, it's about the redistribution of time. -- Douglas Coupland
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Everyone should have a tailor. David Wilkes, the guy who does my stuff, is like, 'Well you're a writer - do you want a special pen compartment or something?' Bespoke: That's the term you want to get out there. -- Douglas Coupland
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It hit him that his own form of loneliness was a luxury, one as chosen and as paid for as three weeks in Kenya's velds or a cherry red Ferrari. Real loneliness wasn't something an assistant scoped out and got a good price on. Real loneliness was smothering and it stank of hopelessness. -- Douglas Coupland
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Which is that there's too much weight improperly distributed: towers and elevators; steel, stone and cement. So much mass up so high that gravity itself could end up being warped
-- Douglas Coupland
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Twinkies are more natural than most TV-interview shows. -- Douglas Coupland
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Nobody cares about worthiness. People care about what is real inside of you. -- Douglas Coupland
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Maybe thinking you're supposed to 'have a life' is a stupid way of buying into an untenable 1950s narrative of what life *supposed* to be. How do we know that all of these people with 'no lives' aren't really on the new frontier of human sentience and preceptions? -- Douglas Coupland
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Even when you take a holiday from technology, technology doesn't take a break from you. -- Douglas Coupland
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The new world lies before her eyes like an opened chest of treasure, a flock of birds over Africa, a thousand TVs all playing at once. -- Douglas Coupland
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I don't want any vegetables, thank you. I paid for the cow to eat them for me. -- Douglas Coupland
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I don't know how anyone gets anything done in cities. How can you live somewhere like London or New York, when there are 81 things to do every night? Awful. Give me solitude and space any time. -- Douglas Coupland
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I'm a pretty good drawer. I have trouble painting because you literally have to wait for the paint to dry. I'm disciplined, but I'm not patient. -- Douglas Coupland
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You can only fall in love six times in your life. Choose wisely. -- Douglas Coupland
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I wonder that all things seem to be from hell these days: dates, jobs, parties, weather ... Could the situation be that we no longer believe in that particular place? Or maybe we were all promised heaving in our lifetimes, and what we ended up with can't hep but suffer in comparison. -- Douglas Coupland
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At least when you're young you're also stupid. -- Douglas Coupland
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If human beings had genuine courage, they'd wear their costumes every day of the year, not just on Halloween. -- Douglas Coupland
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For many people, myself included, the end of the world is happening all the time! It is a form of criticality that paradoxically gives us hope for change and improvement. -- Douglas Coupland
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STRANGELOVE REPRODUCTION: Having children to make up for the fact that one no longer believes in the future. -- Douglas Coupland
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Mphhh ... What did you say Tyler?' Anna-Louise mumbles on the bed above me.
I stand up, and a tame blue bird lands on my shoulder and tries to nibble my earlobe. I gently shake Anna-Louise fully awake. 'Anna-Louise, wake-up,' I say. 'Wake up
the world is alive. -- Douglas Coupland
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HISTORICALOVERDOSING:To live in a period of time when too much seems to happen. -- Douglas Coupland
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I guess the thing about exposing your heart is that people may not even notice it. Like a flop movie. Or they'll borrow your heart and they'll forget to return it to you. -- Douglas Coupland
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It's difficult to speak with beautiful people. No matter how hard you try to pretend otherwise, you still want them to like you. -- Douglas Coupland
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You can't fake competence, creativity, or sexual arousal. -- Douglas Coupland
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Royalty is either going to do very well with cloning, or it's going to disappear completely. -- Douglas Coupland
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I don't know if it's a very smart idea to admire the living. -- Douglas Coupland
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Abe said something interesting. He said that because everyone's so poor these days, the '90s will be a decade with no architectural legacy or style- everyone's too poor to put up new buildings. He said that code is the architecture of the '90s. -- Douglas Coupland
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Question: If there were two of you which one would win? -- Douglas Coupland
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Feeling unique is no indication of uniqueness. -- Douglas Coupland
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The universe is indeed a beautiful place. If you doubt me, go check for yourself. -- Douglas Coupland
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But then a bumblebee bumbled above us and it stole our attention the way flying things can. -- Douglas Coupland
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If our subconscious was attractive, we wouldn't have to bury it down deep within us. -- Douglas Coupland
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Sometimes failure isn't an opportunity in disguise, it's just you. -- Douglas Coupland
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Time ticks by; we grow older. Before we know it, too much time has passed and we've missed the chance to have had other people hurt us. To a younger me this sounded like luck; to an older me this sounds like a quiet tragedy. -- Douglas Coupland
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I don't deserve a soul, yet I still have one. I know because it hurts. -- Douglas Coupland
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I'm an adult. Discipline me and I'll bury you alive. - Roger -- Douglas Coupland
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Brain research tells us that only twenty percent of human beings have a sense of irony, which means that eighty percent of the world takes everything at face value. -- Douglas Coupland
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As the expression goes, we spend our youth attaining wealth, and our wealth attaining youth. -- Douglas Coupland
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Anyway, I want to remember that love can happen. Because there is life after not having a life. I never expected love to happen. What was I expecting from life, then? -- Douglas Coupland
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There are three things we cry for in life: things that are lost, things that are found, and things that are magnificent. -- Douglas Coupland
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Remember travel agents? Remember how they just kind of vanished one day? Well, that's where all the other jobs that once made us middle class are going, to that same magical, class-killing, job-sucking wormhole into which travel agency jobs vanished, never to return. -- Douglas Coupland
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I'm starting to wonder if pop culture is in its dying days, because everyone is able to customize their own lives with the images they want to see and the words they want to read and the music they listen to. You don't have the broader trends like you used to. -- Douglas Coupland
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To bring order into this jangled sphere man must find its centre Marshall McLuhan -- Douglas Coupland
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Las Vegas is a SimCity game gone horribly wrong. -- Douglas Coupland
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I mean five thousand years ago people emerge out of nowhere -sproing!- with brains and everything and begin wrecking the planet. You'd think we'd give the issue a little more thought than we do. -- Douglas Coupland
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Eroticize intelligence. -- Douglas Coupland
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Nobody ever mentions the good side of OxyContin: It makes you feel like Jesus fucking a horse. -- Douglas Coupland
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Long lives aren't natural. We forget that senior citizens are as much an invention as toasters or penicillin. -- Douglas Coupland
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The thing about the future is that it never feels the way we thought it would. -- Douglas Coupland
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There's nothing cure or funny or lovable about being cheap. It's a total turn-off. -- Douglas Coupland
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In the end, I think the relationships that survive in this world are the ones where two people can finish each other's sentences. Forget drama and torrid sex and the clash of opposites. Give me banter any day of the week. -- Douglas Coupland
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Good-looking people with strong, fluoridated teeth get things handed to them on platters. -- Douglas Coupland
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I'm pro-forwards. Do I want the Seventies to come back? No. The haircuts were terrible. Everyone stank. The food was awful. -- Douglas Coupland
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MCJOB: A low-pay, low-prestige, low-dignity, no-future job in the service sector. Frequently considered a satisfying career choice for people who have never held one. -- Douglas Coupland
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I get verklempt if I see a vintage TI-30 or TI-54 calculator. But I don't think I'd want to use one. -- Douglas Coupland
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In the future, IKEA will become an ever more spiritual sanctuary. In the future, your dream life will increasingly look like Google street view. Everyone will be feeling the same way as you, and there's some comfort to be found there. -- Douglas Coupland
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We really ought to give ourselves a collective pat on the back for doing as well as we have in a universe of constant media change and mutation. -- Douglas Coupland
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Hasn't it been a long time since you had a flying dream? -- Douglas Coupland
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There's nothing at the center of what we do ... No center. It doesn't exist. All of us-look at our lives: We have an acceptable level of affluence. We have entertainment. We have a relative freedom from fear. But there's nothing else. -- Douglas Coupland
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No-tech tourism is a form of temporal eco-tourism in which one reads books or watches film and TV precisely because of the absence of 21st-century technologies. -- Douglas Coupland
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Chronotropic Drugs:
Drugs engineered to affect one's sense of time. Chronodecelocotropic drugs have no short term effect but over time give one the impression that time feels longer. Chronoaccelocotropic drugs have the opposite effect. -- Douglas Coupland
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Only losers make decisions when things are bad. The time to rejig your life is the time when it's seemingly smooth. -- Douglas Coupland
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Everybody past a certain age, regardless of how they look on the outside, pretty much constantly dreams of being able to escape from their lives. -- Douglas Coupland
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Neal fished around in a bag, removed something and handed it to me. It was a forky thing, but with a round depression. "What the fuck is this?" "It's a spork. -- Douglas Coupland
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Shopping is Not Creating. -- Douglas Coupland
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I think social and moral disengagement is repugnant. -- Douglas Coupland
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Nerds get what they want when they want it, and they go psycho if it's not immediately available. Nerds overfocus. I guess that's the problem. But it's precisely this ability to narrow-focus that makes them so good at code writing ... -- Douglas Coupland
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Remember how, back in 1990, if you used a cellphone in public you looked like a total asshole? We're all assholes now. -- Douglas Coupland
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The time you feel lonely is the time you most need to be by yourself. -- Douglas Coupland
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People are leaky. -- Douglas Coupland
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innocent." Stupid, stupid woman, but a woman whose daughter was lost in the -- Douglas Coupland
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And when you meet someone and fall in love, and they fall in love with you, you ask them "Will you take my heart
stains and all?" and they say "I will," and they ask you the same question and you say, "I will," too. -- Douglas Coupland
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I don't understand beauty. -- Douglas Coupland
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I think Americans are weirdly puritanistic about psychopharmaceuticals. There are millions of people out there who would otherwise be dead or rocking by themselves in a corner who now lead full and normal lives because of amazing and wonderful scientific advances. -- Douglas Coupland
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Florida isn't so much a place where one goes to reinvent oneself, as it is a place where one goes if one no longer wished to be found. -- Douglas Coupland
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Discussions of generations only go downhill. There's no point in having them. -- Douglas Coupland
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Microserfs (1995) p28 'He's thinking of quitting [Microsoft] to be a pixelation broker, going around to museums to digitize their paintings -- Douglas Coupland
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I think we're simply going to run out of Nature before we have a chance to destroy it. -- Douglas Coupland
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I think individual people are interesting, not really groups of people. -- Douglas Coupland
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Canadians can easily 'pass for American' as long as we don't accidentally use metric measurements or apologize when hit by a car. -- Douglas Coupland
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The universe hands you opportunities for a while, and if you don't take them, the universe says to itself, 'Oh I see, this person doesn't like opportunities' and stops giving them to you. -- Douglas Coupland
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Only the disenfranchised can party with abandon. -- Douglas Coupland
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Ski boots are the worst. Solid plastic. They'll be around till the sun goes supernova. -- Douglas Coupland
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You can have information or you can have a life, but you can't have both. -- Douglas Coupland
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Sometimes the best lighting of all is a power failure. -- Douglas Coupland
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[ ... ] and it was like the universe had suddenly turned itself off and the world was almost holy, like life was suddenly religious, but good religious, and suddenly everyone became the best version of themselves. -- Douglas Coupland
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Time erases both the best and the worst of us. -- Douglas Coupland
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Characters in a book are very much like personalities divvied up within a family. In the end, it all averages out to a sort of overall averageness. -- Douglas Coupland
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High school is such a shared experience in North American culture. -- Douglas Coupland
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In the old days people had far fewer channels in which to place their imaginative time. There's definitely more competition for time ... and yet people seem to be reading [books] as much. -- Douglas Coupland
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I don't like telephones: I don't like when they ring. Just because it rings, you have to pick it up. I don't even like opening mail; I'm weird. -- Douglas Coupland
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Games I do find interesting for what they say about us, about what we wish for, about the programming. But let it stop there: don't listen to this rubbish about them actually being good for you, helping with hand-eye co-ordination or whatever. They're games. They prepare you for nothing. -- Douglas Coupland
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Marshall alone his room with a comically tall stack of books, methodically absorbing their contents as though they were drugs ... -- Douglas Coupland
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When we constantly ask for miracles, we're unraveling the fabric of the world. A world of continuous miracles would not be a world, it would be a cartoon. -- Douglas Coupland
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-a feeling at once destructive, romantic, and grand-like falling into a swimming pool dressed in a tuxedo. -- Douglas Coupland
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Why are we even here [on earth], what's our human nature? It's precipitating a real philosophical crisis that I find quite fascinating. -- Douglas Coupland
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It's what makes us different from every other creature in the world - we have time. And we have choices -- Douglas Coupland
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It feels wistful to imagine a time when people didn't go about their daily routine with the assumption that at any moment another massive media technology will be dumped on us by some geek in California. -- Douglas Coupland
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Handmade presents are scary because they reveal that you have too much free time. -- Douglas Coupland
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The thing about the end of the world is that not just the West collapses, the whole world does. -- Douglas Coupland
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Life need not be a story, but it does need to be an adventure. -- Douglas Coupland
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One of the cruelest things you can do to another person is pretend you care about them more than you really do. -- Douglas Coupland
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There are few, if any, Canadian men that have never spelled their name in a snow bank. -- Douglas Coupland
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Q: If you could be an animal, what kind of animal would you be?
A: You already are an animal. -- Douglas Coupland
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Capitalization implies a hierarchy, that some letters are more special than others. -- Douglas Coupland
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If money is not maintained, it can collapse like a bridge along Interstate 5 and fixing it, even with determined politicians, will take ages, during which time God only knows how much human damage will occur. -- Douglas Coupland
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If I think too much about all of those Chinese factories where all the stuff in a Wal-Mart is made, I get that woozy feeling you get when you see ducks covered in crude oil. -- Douglas Coupland
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The way we experience history and time in all its forms shifted quite massively between 1989 and 2001 - to the point where contrivances like decades are now kind of silly. -- Douglas Coupland
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I've always thought that you live in the present, you live in a specific present. You are writing, present tense, so write in the present as it is. -- Douglas Coupland
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Where does personality end and brain damage begin? -- Douglas Coupland
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What if it was cats who invented technology, would they have TV shows starring rubber sqeaky toys? -- Douglas Coupland
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What's a bar bill but a surtax on reality? -- Douglas Coupland
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It is indeed a mistake to confuse children with angels -- Douglas Coupland
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We'll go to a place that's quiet and dry and talk about precious things. -- Douglas Coupland
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Nobody likes being told who or what they are. -- Douglas Coupland
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We can no longer create the feeling of an era ... of time being particular to one spot in time. -- Douglas Coupland
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When you grow up these days, you're told you're going to have four or five different careers during your lifetime. But what they don't tell you is that you're also going to be four or five different people along the way. -- Douglas Coupland
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We're all born lost, aren't we? We're all born separated from God - over and over life makes sure to inform us of this - and yet we're all real: we have names, we have lives. We mean something. We must. -- Douglas Coupland
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Is that all time is - our perception of how quickly it does or does not pass? -- Douglas Coupland
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I thought it would be such a sick joke to have to remain to be alive for decades and not believe in or feel anything. -- Douglas Coupland
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Society indeed conspires to keep you ball and chained. -- Douglas Coupland
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I want pills called September 10. You take one and your mind feels like the 11th never happened. -- Douglas Coupland
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You're smarter than TV. So what? -- Douglas Coupland
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Our curse as humans is that we are trapped in time; our curse is that we are forced to interpret life as a sequence of events - a story - and when we can't figure out what our particular story is, we feel lost somehow. -- Douglas Coupland
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Remember: the time you feel lonely is the time you most need to be by yourself. Life's cruelest irony. -- Douglas Coupland
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Life always wins. -- Douglas Coupland
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With the first drink comes the truth, with the second drink comes wishful thinking, and with the third drink come the lies. -- Douglas Coupland
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My house. It's kind of eccentric. It's two decades worth of accumulated personal projects. Yeah, it is pretty dense in my house. -- Douglas Coupland
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Men won't read any email from a woman that's over 200 words long. -- Douglas Coupland
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Sometimes you can't realize you're in a bad mood until another person enters your orbit. -- Douglas Coupland
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If nothing else, we simply get used to being alive. -- Douglas Coupland
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The thing with bookshelves, no matter how many you have, you always fill them. -- Douglas Coupland
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He said, A ring is a halo for your finger. From now on, we no longer cast two shadows, we cast one. -- Douglas Coupland
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Keep your treasure to yourself. -- Douglas Coupland