Discover the most popular and inspiring quotes and sayings on the topic of Ass. Share them with your friends on social media platforms like Facebook, Twitter, or your personal blogs, and let the world be inspired by their powerful messages. Here are the Top 100 Ass Quotes And Sayings by 95 Authors including Laurann Dohner,Bobby Adair,Mark Twain,Vince Mcmahon,Tao Lin for you to enjoy and share.

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Your fascination with my ass isn't healthy, you know. I'm apparently already taken. My lover-to-be might beat you with his walking stick or toss his dentures at you if you put your gorilla-sized hands on that region of my body." Anger -- Laurann Dohner
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suburban-cocooned ass -- Bobby Adair
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None but an ass pays a compliment and asks a favour at the same time. There are many asses. -- Mark Twain
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If I were someone named Mr. Ass, I'd be really worried about doing time. -- Vince Mcmahon
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i recommend the phrase 'pineapple ass -- Tao Lin
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You can't say asses in church unless you are speaking of donkeys. -- Allan Dare Pearce
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There's two things I really like to do and that's whoop ass and look good. I'm doing one of them right now and on Saturday night, I'm doing the other. -- Conor Mcgregor
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Methought I was enamoured of an ass. -- Titania
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Carpe Rectum. Seize the hot ass the good Lord has provided. -- Valerie Z. Lewis
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Take this and stick it up your ass." I -- Christina Lauren
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Gotta love a woman that can hand you your own ass. -- Penelope Douglas
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So you'll be my bodyguard for any guys who want to introduce me to anal?' I joke.
'I will defend your virtue and your ass to the death,' he says with a knightly vow. -- Bianca Giovanni
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I swear to you that I am not quite such an ass as I like to appear sometimes, although I am rather an ass, I admit. -- Fyodor Dostoyevsky
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You can't let people take advantage of you. Go get that ass. -- J. B. Smoove
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How could something called 'The Breath of the Ass' help but bring trouble? -- Tom Robbins
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Soon as we get the ass, we start callin em hoes. -- Drake
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An ass is beautiful to an ass, and a pig is beautiful to a pig. -- John Ray
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In the ass is how you create loyalty. -- Philip Roth
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Puny human body, my ass! -- Margaret Weis
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Asses are made to bear, and so are you. -- William Shakespeare
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Being an ass trumps being a piece of ass. -- Cherry Cheva
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What is said behind my back is said to my ass. -- Georges Clemenceau
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Christ rode on an ass, but now asses ride on Christ. -- Heinrich Heine
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I'm about to enter a national ass-kicking contest. With no legs. And a massive ass. -- Julia Louis-Dreyfus
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But she was funny sometimes, and never boring. God, it would almost be worth it to see her face when she realized that I had saved her ass again.
Actually it was quite a nice ass, come to think of it. In fact, my memory of the ass and its owner seemed to be remarkably clear. -- Ilona Andrews
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They call me Seymour Butts, cause I get more ass than most. -- Ludacris
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I was more ass than assassin. -- Mark Lawrence
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Kiss my ass and my anus'cause it's finally famous -- Nicki Minaj
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The ass that's officially owned by me?" Gavin caressed his hands down her waist, settling on said ass. "This one? Ah, yes. Yes, this one. I love this ass."
"Owned?" Emily playfully questioned.
"Yes ... owned. Never to be leased by another. I'm king landlord, sweets. -- Gail Mchugh
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Those that can't beat the ass, beat the saddle. -- Robert Graves
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Get your assets working for you so that your "ass" isn't working for someone else. -- Robert Kiyosaki
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You know what? You know what? You know what?' I was waving my finger under her nose. 'You scratched the Son of God. That's your ass, that's what. -- Christopher Moore
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My ass is big because a lot of people have to kiss it. -- Jenni Rivera
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Asses prefer garbage to gold. -- Heraclitus
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No anal problems here. -- Parker Tyler
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I showed sideboob. I don't need to show ass. You get one or the other. You don't get both. -- Mila Kunis
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Always wanted a girl with a heart-shaped ass. Most of my exes have ass-shaped hearts. -- Quentin R. Bufogle
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Save your ass, give my ass.... what a friend you are... -- Deyth Banger
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My back is too long or something because my ass is constantly hanging out. -- Robert Pattinson
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No," I said, louder this time. "I mean asscrown. The crown on top of the asshat that covers the asshole of the assclown. The very zenith in the hierarchy of asses," I said, as though reading from a dictionary of modern profanity. -- Michelle Hodkin
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When I'm in really good shape, I like my butt. It's juicy - that's what my fiance says. -- Ali Larter
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The ass will carry his load, but not a double load; ride not a free horse to death. -- Miguel De Cervantes
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Don't you mean 'assclown'?" he looked amused.
"No," I said louder this time. "I mean asscrown. The crown on top of the asshat that covers the asshole of the assclown. The very zenith in the hierarchy of asses. -- Michelle Hodkin
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No doubt about it! I gotta get a new ass! -- Tony Millionaire
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...your ass is grass... -- Lauren Myracle
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Sucks to your ass-mar! -- William Golding
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Her angel's pants were molded to a nice, beefy ass -- Laurann Dohner
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I want to flog your ass and I want it bare. -- Lainie Suzanne
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If I believed in a god, it would be the god of women's asses. -- Shay Savage
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Conceive you - that ass! -- Joseph Conrad
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Now please don't refer to yourself ass some woman I fuck occasionally because, quite frankly, it makes me mad, and you really wouldn't like me when Im angry. -- E.l. James
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If I touch it, that ass is gonna go off. -- Cassie Mae
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There'd been some nights when my fat ass had saved my ass (ba-dum-tsh). -- Lish Mcbride
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You don't know your ass from a hole in the ground, you know that? -- Barry Webster
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Wow, he must get more ass than a toilet seat! -- Kresley Cole
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According to my figures I've only had 2500 pieces of ass but I've watched 12500 horse races, and if I have any advice to anybody, it's this: take up watercolor painting. -- Charles Bukowski
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I hate fighting with you," he whispers.
"Well, stop being such an arse."
He chuckles and the captivating sound reverberates through his chest. He tightens his hold on me. "Arse?"
"I prefer arse."
"You should. It suits you. -- E.l. James
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Damn, Lu. When did you get an ass like this? -- Gina L. Maxwell
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Never let 'em see you ache"; that's what Mr. Mayer always said. Or was it ass; "Never let 'em see your ass"? -- Carrie Fisher
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I'm going to write a book someday and the title will be I'm an Ass, You're an Ass. That's the most liberating, wonderful thing in the world, when you openly admit you're an ass. It's wonderful. When people tell me, You're wrong I say, What can you expect of an ass? -- Anthony De Mello
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Off, end this lies it's not awesome. Please take this crap, second very clever and smart, but I want to add suffix (-ass), it's very suitable, isn't it? -- Deyth Banger
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Can I ask you why there was the imprint of an ass on great-grandma's table? I got up the other morning and come in here to have my coffee. I sat down and got ready to read the paper , when low and behold I was confronted with the imprint of an ass on the table. -- Alex Morgan
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I can't hit a ball more than 200 yards. I have no butt. You need a butt if you're going to hit a golf ball. -- Dennis Quaid
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If you have pain in your ass, it doesn't mean you have done something wrong, but it's probably because you're wearing your little brother's underwear. -- Waheed Ibne Musa
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By outward show let's not be cheated; An ass should like an ass be treated. -- John Gay
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dont be an ass-hat!! -- P.c. Cast
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Kiss the fattest part of my ass -- Jen Lancaster
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Butt holes are like a one-way street; they were made the way they were for a reason. -- Nenia Campbell
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First comes the cash, then comes the ass, then come big blunts with chunks of hash. -- The Notorious B.i.g.
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I hate behind the scenes ass muthafuckas. -- Kedy B.
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Jokes about butts WORKED. -- Drew Magary
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I tagged your ass the other night," I said, "while you were sleeping- and you liked it."
"Really? I thought it was a dream."
"It was. A WET one. -- Giorge Leedy
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Standing in the shower, I feel something on the back of my leg that turns out to be my ass. -- Mary Karr
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What are you gonna do for a face when the baboon wants his ass back? -- Abraham Lincoln
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My feet walked me down the aisle of the Greyhound bus, all the way to the back. My butt sat me in a seat.
My butt's accomplished a lot since then.
My butt's a movie star. -- Chuck Palahniuk
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This [my backside] is still very, very big. -- Renee Zellweger
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Captain Assbag No Fun? -- Karina Halle
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Hand off my ass or I'll rip off your balls. -- Katie Mcgarry
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I must do whatever I can to find the best partners possible."
"Did you kick their butts?"
He frowned. "The buttocks are among the least sensitive places to hit someone."
I laughed. "It's a figure of speech."
"To kick butts. Interesting. -- Allison Van Diepen
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I'd rather be a little behind than a big ass. -- John C. Daly
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No matter how you twist and turn, your ass is always in the back. -- Andrew Sturm
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Well, fella, as much as I'd like to stick something up your ass, it ain't gonna be my finger or anything else on my body - sorry to disappoint. -- A. Violet End
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I will get your some clothes, a sword, and your very own assassin to join you on your quest."
"Ooh, just what I've always wanted. A man whose job title had the word ass in it not once, but two times. -- Quinn Loftis
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You say asshole; I say hole of the ass, but we say same thing, yes?" - Babushka Ivanov -- Jessie Lane
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In the history of man, there has been and always will be more horses' asses than horses. -- Jeffrey Fry
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Fuck your brothers in the ass backwards. -- Tijan
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ass first, into a bowser. -- Des Parker
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I rub a hand over my face. I'm an ass. A really, really confused ass. -- Lauren Layne
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A fan of that ass, more than likely, I figured. -- Mariana Zapata
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Shut up, candy-ass, -- Stephen King
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Don't ya ever get too big for your britches or someone's gonna bust your britches wide open and then they'll find out you got a butt like everybody else. Nothing special about it. -- Cathy Lamb
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O, that he were here to write me down an ass! But, masters, remember, that I am an ass; though it be not written down, yet forget not that I am an ass. -- William Shakespeare
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Just relax and breathe through your ass. -- Lewis Black
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You can't be fully present in your body without being present in your ass. -- Charlie Glickman
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Not really. But I'm a huge fan of your ass. I could write a song about your ass. "
"You've never even seen it."
"Feeling is believing. -- Emily Snow
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I seen her on the ave, spotted her more than once.
Ass so fat that you could see it from the front ... -- Mos Def
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When making your ass, always draw the shape of Africa, or as Latrice would say, the homeland. -- Sharon Needles
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What do we get when the Donald exposes his enormous ass? A trump roast. -- Michael R. Burch
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You could smell my ass from mars. -- Joe Rogan
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What I'm trying to do is save your ass, gorgeous. -- Massimo Carlotto