Discover the most popular and inspiring quotes and sayings on the topic of Farting. Share them with your friends on social media platforms like Facebook, Twitter, or your personal blogs, and let the world be inspired by their powerful messages. Here are the Top 100 Farting Quotes And Sayings by 94 Authors including Johannes Rand, Magnificent Ruin,Brian Mcfadden,Brian Johnson,Luo Guanzhong,Stacey Lee for you to enjoy and share.

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Repooping is the purest form of pooping
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When I was at school I got lines for dropping a big squelchy, loud fart. My teacher, who was a priest, made me write 'I must not fart in class' 100 times. I left that school shortly afterwards.
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SPIRITUAL FARTS Reverend Michael Beckwith2 tells us that if we simply study and talk about spiritual truths but never actually LIVE the stuff, we're gonna get spiritual indigestion and constipation. Spiritual farts. It's not a pretty thing. Seriously.
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When I tell you you'll fart and pee in your pants with terror.
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Breathing is underrated.
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tonguing her clit. I
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Chewing the food of sweet and bitter fancy.
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You gotta fart, Jayne. You've gotta break the spell. Fart for all you're worth! Let your butt sing!
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Dry-humping, I believe it's called.
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Have you been sniffing fairy farts?
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Zart the fart, you start.
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a total fucking gas
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Oh? And what's so stinking about it?.
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Putting out the stars and extinguishing the sun.
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The old man was in agony because of gas. He farted tremendously, and then he belched.
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He's only being polite. You should look the word up," Denise settled on.
Ian snorted. "And angels fly out of my arse when I fart."

First Drop of Crimson by Jeaniene Frost
Page 78
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Moving your asshole-mouth & YES SIR I am saying NO MA'AM I am saying.
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Sleepwalking down the hall like a firefly in the fog.
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That is a fart without wind ... in reference to when you can't back up what you say. very funny.
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Breathing in and breathing out, those two things we must never forget about.
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Swearing when in heavy traffic.
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Oi, doll, ignore him,' said Sia, using a notebook to fan her face. 'Sweet lord, I'm like a human hot-water bottle wrapped in doona in front of a heater at the moment. And did I tell you about the constant farting?
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If I could light my own farts I could fly to the moon or at least Uranus.
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Life would be perfect if monster would stop farting.
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Sometimes it's things that take the joy out of life, like a blowout when you're hitting sixty or a button coming off of a shirt when you're in a hurry, but usually it's people.
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Whistling to keep myself from being afraid.
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Ela did you just fart? Because you just blew me away.
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It's called ergot. Smell
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There's a place for farts, and there's a place for sharts.
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Zart the Fart, you start. There
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Busying herself with inconsequential tasks.
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Are you still doing that crap?" I ask.
"You can't even do it properly," Eileen says.
"Just a matter of practice," Simone says.
"Wow! Practicing how to poison yourself and make your breath reek like the fart of a seagull!" Eileen cries.
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Today, I made a log of farts.
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living in a stinking
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smouldering away in a fit of impotent rage
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Decency, not to dare to do that in public which it is decent enough to do in private.
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And now to sleep, to dream...perchance to fart.
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Battering the gates of heaven with the storms of prayer.
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A long, loud, and canorous peal of laughter.
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Earth's flaming farts, it worked!
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Boredom, that traitorous devil that posseses us to do things sometimes useless, and often stupid.
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A fart is not only a political statement; it is also a weapon.
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(My proudest moment as a child was the time I beat my uncle Pierre at Scrabble with the seven-letter word FARTING.)
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Q: What sound or noise do you love? A: Puppies sighing.
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Singing in front of people. It's like having your heart beat outside of you.
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I don't feel so good." Lula said. And she farted.
She squeezed her eyes shut tight and did a full minute-long fart. "Excuse me." she said.
I was horrified and impressed all at the same time. It was a record breaking fart. On my best day, I couldn't come near to farting like that.
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Protecting myself from the influx of painful stimuli, just give me space and I shall be okay.
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Postponing doing the really interesting things in life for later, when you don't have the energy.
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Gods curse it, Kel, you heard what he said!"
"I heard a fart," Kel said grimly. You know where those come from. Let it go." -Faleron and Kel
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Kissing babies and hugging fat girls.
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If you're on a plane and the person in front of you starts slowly tilting to one side, it means he's letting out a fart. Take cover!
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I'm too old to be farting around with stuff that isn't precisely what I want to do.
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You're funny.' Phoebe passed me the last chocolate cupcake. 'And I always thought your friends were laughing over their own farts.'
'Ninety percent of Eastwood's male population laughs over their own farts. Present company excluded, naturally.
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A fart in the face is love.
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The worst thing a girl could do on a date is fart louder than me.
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And Father's fondness for talking about farting and going to the bathroom is disgusting.
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That has less significance than a dog's fart.
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Sleeping. The word came out with an adorable lack of anything resembling an L, closer to something you'd do with a broom than in a bed.
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pooping is god's greatest invention
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I thought the fart was a human thing. It's something to do with like, arse cheeks, or whatever.
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Your job today is to pass gas. You do that and we can start feeding you liquids. No fart, no food.
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The insupportable labor of doing nothing.
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Ah, babies! They're more than just adorable little creatures on whom you can blame your farts.
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If you eat Chinese food, your farts come out like Chinese food. If you eat Mexican food, your farts come out like Mexican food. And milk, it's like - you can smell the warmth in the fart. My wardrobe on Transformers always smells like farts, and I have no idea why.
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his parents huffing after him;
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Breathing in, breathing out, ain't that what it's all about. Living life crazy loud, like I have the right to.
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What is it that I especially find utterly unendurable? That I cannot cope with, that makes me choke and faint? Bad air! Bad air! The approach of some ill-constituted thing; that I have to smell the entrails of some ill-constituted soul!
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Trying to pretend to oneself that a life of constant self frustration was in fact a great spiritual attainment.
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You're taking up oxygen that could be better spent coming out of someone's ass.
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You're talking farts, not words!
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A Waft of Cheese
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Ululation. We got animals inside of us, man. We've got all this power.
- The Son
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Even the idea of a fart makes me laugh. Saying the word 'fart' makes me laugh. I have iFart on my phone. I have remote whoopee cushions. Farts. To me, there's nothing funnier.
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I suppose the difference between baby people and me is that I do not consider smiling while farting 'holding up your end of a conversation.
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Praying for the end of time, so I can end my time with you.
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... "shagging" - a quasi-comical activity, like belching or farting, except it was more taboo and more necessary than these.
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Spontaneous laughter induces.
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On My First Driving Lesson First things first: A car has five gears. What is that smell? ... Okay, first thing before that first thing: Farting in a car that's not moving makes you an asshole.
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Relieve stress through hysterical screaming.
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My pet peeve is hearing a knock on the bathroom door followed by the familiar words, 'What are you doing in there?
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To burning my father to the ground.
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Shitty nappy whizzing through the air, you don't see that in the brochures.
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Saying "now it's done" . It's horrible. Sometimes I force myself to do it or I know I will turn crazy.
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I tell you, we are here on Earth to fart around, and don't let anybody tell you different.
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You're walking around as though everyone is farting roses and pissing champagne. What's up?
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My dad was proud of himself when he farted. He sounds like he's strangling a chicken when he farts.
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An employer's fart is music to his employees' ears.
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He wondered how many lives had been snuffed out by that fart.
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Having kids means there's always someone around to blame your fart on.
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Fiddling knobs, touching keys, having fun with a full grown man.
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If people are talking behind your back, then just fart.
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Satiated with the great purposelessness of it, we gently belched nerve gases into the next generation
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How would you be able to detect a fart over your natural odor, Sanza?" "For shame," said Galdo. "There's no Sanzas here, remember? I'm an Asino." "Oh yes," said Locke with a yawn. "Yes, you certainly are.
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Not giving a fuck and not being able to give a fuck.
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The smell!" Penumbra repeats. "You know you are finished when people start talking about the smell.
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I feel like a drummer with no sticks and somebody keeps farting on my snare drum.
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I try to hold it in until I get on the ice, then in front of the net sometimes I'll pass gas.
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The horrible pleasure of pleasing inferior people.
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During job interviews, when they ask: 'What is your worst quality?', I always say: 'Flatulence'. That way I get my own office.
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From every Englishman emanates a kind of gas, the deadly choke-damp of boredom.