Discover the most popular and inspiring quotes and sayings on the topic of Jibes. Share them with your friends on social media platforms like Facebook, Twitter, or your personal blogs, and let the world be inspired by their powerful messages. Here are the Top 100 Jibes Quotes And Sayings by 89 Authors including Dan Slott,James Joyce,Ben Aaronovitch,James Patterson,P.g. Wodehouse for you to enjoy and share.
Well, She's (She-Hulk) quippy. I'm quippy. When we get together, we quip. And, quipwise, I think that makes me a better quipper. -Spiderman
The Gracehoper was always jigging ajog, hoppy on akkant of his joyicity.
The word 'bollocks' is one of the most beautiful and flexible in the English language. It can be used to express emotional states ranging from ecstatic surprise to weary resignation in the face of inevitable disaster. And
Steve turned to us again, looking so dang enthusastic that I wondered how much coffee he'd had this morning. "So, you kids want to be big stars, eh?"
God, no!" I said spewing crumbs. "No way!"
Oddly, this seemed to throw a petite wrench into the convo.
What ho, Stinker.' 'Hallo, Bertie.' 'Long time since we met.' 'It is a bit, isn't it?' 'I hear you're a curate now.' 'Yes, that's right.' 'How are the souls?
They's scandalous things goes on in this here camp,' she said darkly. Ever' Sat'dy night they's dancin', an' not only squar' dancin', neither. They's some does clutch-an'-hug dancin'! I seen 'em.
Red lights, green lights, stop and go jive. Headlines, deadlines, jamming your mind.
I wonder if, as a society, we will ever be able to call someone a jive tofurkey.
Jehowah-Jireh is my provider, redeemer and defender.
You Jig, you amble, and you lisp.
General jackdaw culture, very little more than a collection of charming miscomprehensions, untargeted enthusiasms, and a general habit of skimming.
Cut it out." She gave Peabody a shove. "You're making my eye twitch."
"We're just sitting here."
"I know sex giggles when I hear them."
"I wasn't giggling."
"Not you. Him."
McNab just grinned at her. "Those were manly chuckles."
"You're cops. Be cops.
This isn't one of your spankerchiefs, is it?" "The hell?" "You know, your jizz rag?
Jeeves, Mr Little is in love with that female."
"So I gathered, sir. She was slapping him in the passage."
I clutched my brow.
"Slapping him?"
"Yes, sir. Roguishly.
Forget about what goblins would do. Forget about what an adventurer would do. I need to figure out what Jig should do.
What is wrong with you?" I whispered furiously.
"Nothing," he said, surprised. "I feel great."
"But how can you be so ... so jaunty?"
"Jaunty? I've never been jaunty. I hope never to be jaunty.
I said, 'Hey', she said, 'Hi.'
I said, 'Us', she said, 'Try,'
'And if you're thinkin strictly boots, then I'll say baby, bye bye.'
Are you just hoping to see some boobs, Rose?" Sebby asked. "Is that what this is about?"
"Oh yeah," Rose said. "I've got a one-track mind and it's all about JV boobs.
Juke glanced into her cup before tipping it down to her mouth. "Screw you!"
"Now come on, sugar, you know I don't swing that way."
"Whatever!
I'm lonely, Jeeves.'
'You have a great many friends,sir.'
'What's the good of friends?'
'Emerson,' I reminded him,'says a friend may well be reckoned the masterpiece of Nature,sir.'
'Well, you can tell Emerson from me next time you see him that he's an ass.'
'Very good, sir.
Tex looked at Duke "She's got spunk," he said.
"Where I come from, we call it sass," Duke replied.
"Where I come from, we call it attitude," Smithie put in.
"Oh for the love of God, whatever you call
it, are you in or are you out?" Jules clipped.
Whats the name you Poms have for that thing where you jump up and down and hit each other with sticks?"
"Sex?"
"Gardening?"
He snapped his fingers. "Morris dancing.
John?
As it was dark he whistled a what.
You are such a male of worth, you know that. You really are.
Want to talk about Shakespeare's sonnets?" asked Orphu of Io.
Are you shitting me?" The moravecs loved the ancient human colloquial phrases, the more scatological the better.
Yes," said Orphu. "I am most definitely shitting you, my friend.
Naughty John, Naughty John, does his work with his apron on. Cuts your throat and takes your bones, sells 'em off for a coupla stones.
I've had a lot of food but if you don't jiggle me too much you can have your wicked way with me.
Disco is just jitterbug.
Jests that give pains are no jests.
Cribbage, n. A substitute for conversation among those to whom nature has denied ideas.
Jest with your equals.
Cheap jokes and dirty minds." Patrick
Fie, fie, how frantically I square my talk!
Koekebakker, I feel so strange inside.' 'Well you certainly smell like jenever,' I said. 'No,' Japi said, ' it's not the jenever. I think my soul is too big.
Hot and hasty, like a Scotch jig.
Quip fast, die young.
So much importance pressed into so few words. It was just like Jacin.
I looked over and Jim Morrison was dancing the jitterbug with my grandmother on the coffee table.
This Fruity Pebble that ya dealin' with, I ain't ya average jabroni. I'm like a big purple pinwheel, Rock, so go ahead and blow me.
No milk, gone out for breakfast, then to Hamleys, want to beat crowds. PS Know who killed Quine.
Fella says today, 'Depression is over. I seen a jackrabbit, an' they wasn't nobody after him.' An' another fella says, 'That aint the reason. Can't afford to kill jackrabbits no more. Catch 'em and milk 'em an' turn 'em loose. One you seen prob'ly gone dry.
Something girls never understood about poker night. The real point of the card play was to razz. Razzing calls forth unbridled farm-boy humour, earthy by some standards. The best quip involves belittling someone else's penis, or turning it back on the sayer, or both.
To certain temperaments, especially when previously agitated by any deep feeling, there is perhaps nothing more exasperating, andwhich sooner explodes all self-command, than the coarse, jeering insolence of a porter, cabman, or hack-driver.
Hell...chickens,' Jack groused. It was the snickering that really woke me. And the sound of... Elder Jacobs.... muttering, 'Chickens?' 'Kill 'em... bastards,' Jack snorted.
Music should be used for the perception of God, not jitterbugging.
I'm going to play,' says Armand, lacing his fingers and cracking the knuckles. 'A pair of these lads can pump for me.'
'Is this a time for playing?' asks Jean Baptiste. Then, 'You are right. You have never been more so.
JDAASDOOPCWCTSGM
JOSS-STICKS- Small sticks burned by the Chinese in their pagan tomfoolery, in imitation of certain sacred rites of our holy religion.
Down through the years certain fads of slang had come and gone, and their vestiges could be found in Janie's and Mabel's conversation, like mastodon bones in a swamp.
Audacious ribald: your laughter will finish in hideous boredom before morning.
Taking in their expressions, I just knew it.
Logan had enlisted them.
The bugger.
"Oh dear God." I let my head fall back as if in supplication to an unmerciful deity. "Why me?"
Joss snorted. "Yeah, doesn't it suck when gorgeous, funny, loyal Scotsmen fall in love with us?
Got one," P.J. called. "Motherfucker is ball-less and singing soprano."
"Jesus, that woman is vicious," Joe muttered.
"That's our girl," Renshaw called back smugly.
This understanding floats on the surface of Jija's mind for the rest of the day after Renthree leaves. The truth is beneath the surface, a Leviathan waiting to uncurl, but the waters of his thoughts are placid for now. Denial is powerful.
What in god's name happened to your nuts?"
"They met a jet-powered water hose."
He grimaced.
"They're already healing."
A rare glint of amusement lit Lawrence's eyes. "You have balls of steel."
"You have inappropriate humour.
Once shit on, twice shy," Jan
Chuck said, "Hey. How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?" Cawley looked over at him. "I'll bite. How many?" "Fish," Chuck said and let loose a bright bark of a laugh.
I nod seriously, "Supes."
"You're mocking me."
"A little bit."
"People say supes!"
"What people?"
"I can't believe you're shaming me right now. I'm very sensitive about my use of cool vernacular."
"Then we're good. Because you haven't used any." I flash a grin.
I was on my bus, and on my bus I have a yoga swing. Jennifes comes on, and she goes, ' Hi, Woody, I'm J
is that a sex swing?' Her first sentence to me.
Mother Goose chuckled to herself. "Jack is nimble, Jack is quick - but Jack can be such a - " She stopped herself from finishing the thought, perhaps remembering she was talking to thirteen-year-olds. "I think I've had enough bubbly for one night. It's time for bed anyway.
A wit with dunces, and a dunce with wits.
Come and get it, J," she teased.
"You are an illusion," Jatred answered calmly.
"Am I?"
"You just walked on the water, but your dress is dry," he snorted.
Slang surely, as it is called, comes of, and breathes of the personal
What do you mean, Jesus?' May Roper pulled the crocheted sea a little further up her legs.
'On the drainpipe. I've seen Him with my own eyes.'
'Have you been in the sun again, Brian?'
'Sheila Dakin thinks it's a sign.'
'A sign she's been at the sherry.
You went shopping with Rebecca?'
'Yep,' I said, pulling the shoes out of the box.
His brows went to the heavens.
'Wow, those are like ... Jenn shoes.'
'These are not hooker shoes,' I said defensively.
'Well played,' he said.
Now that your speech impediment has been rectified, perhaps you might say something. It would be best if it were humorous. I enjoy a good jest.'
'You are dreadfully rude,' I said to him.
He sighed. 'That wasn't the slightest bit funny.
If teachers and grammar school editors find my jawbreaker sentences shatter their mushmilk teeth, let them eat stale cake dunked in weak tea of their own ungodly manufacture.
What's this for?' I said. And this veck replied, interrupting his like song an instant, that it was to keep my gulliver still and make me look at the screen. 'But,' I said, 'I want to look at the screen. I've been brought here to viddy films and viddy films I shall.
Jesting is often only indigence of intellect.
Two cliches make us laugh. A hundred cliches move us. For we sense dimly that the cliches are talking among themselves, and celebrating a reunion.
My little Jasnah, insufferable and wonderful.
Even with the utterly lost, to whom life and death are equally jests, there are matters of which no jest can be made.
Richard cocks his hand at me and yelps, "Tootles" then saunters off, and for a moment I am transfixed, imagining him walking to Ricky Martins, "Shake your bon-bon!
Jackie Bachman says, "Hey, you got your tits this summer!" And I roll my shoulders forward, the huge wrecking balls of that summer pressing their flesh on my hanging belly. "Shut up, bitch," I say.
You're robbing the cradle, then," he said. Humor filled his face. "You're a cougar."
Laughter burbled out of me, part of it relieved nerves, the other part surprise at the play on words. "I'm not that kind of cougar," I said, my tone lofty.
I thought I'd go to a craft fair, and there would be a jar of jellybeans there - "Guess how many jellybeans are in this jar, and win a prize". Aw, come on, man, let just me have some. I'll tell you what, guess how many jellybeans I want! If you guessed a handful, you are right.
.Clumsy jesting is no joke.
Genuine witticisms surprise those who say them as much as those who listen to them; they arise in us in spite of us, or, at least, without our participation,
like everything inspired.
The hapless wit has his labors always to begin, the call for novelty is never satisfied, and one jest only raises expectation of another.
Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!
Round-heads and Wooden-shoes are standing jokes.
Everyone today is like, 'Shailene, you're getting so much buzz. How does the feel?' It's the most odd question because it's like asking a kid who got into Cornell how it feels to be the top of your class at one of the Ivy League schools. How do you answer that? You just go, 'I don't know.'
I hadn't planned on sounding like J.J. from Good Times, but that's the gist.
When the humours were handed out, Ankh-Morpork got the one for joking and Quirm had to do make do with their expertise in fine dining and love-making.
This is crap," Shaun said, withdrawing his arm.
"Right," I agreed.
"Absolutely fucking crap."
"No argument."
"I want to punch somebody right about now."
"Not it," Rick said.
"I punch back," Steve said.
passing insults back and forth, as if they were biscuits.
What are you doing?" Blake asked.
"Getting rid of it," I said, feeling unusually antsy.
"That's perfectly good J!" Blake protested.
"Sorry." I dumped the last of it.
"Front-row seats at the suicide show," Ginger said. "Lovely.
I see. Is Jim with you now?"
"Yes, he is. We're having rough sex. You're interrupting.
"What are you doing here?"
"Looking for Jim in your bed."
"He isn't here."
"I see that.
Humor wades across a brook, wit jumps over it.
Do I look Japenses to you?"
"I've told you, yes.
Jiqian, a member of the ruling Toba clan,
A jest's prosperity lies in the ear Of him that hears it, never in the tongue Of him that makes it.
I'm the leader of the pack, which makes me such a lucky Jack, for openers, here's a pair of cuties, here's my darling dealing beauties.
The next person who tells me something like, "Squiggle-fuck the rightwise cock-swatter with a starboard jib," is going to get a knife to the throat.
The blighter's manner was so cold and unchummy that I bit the bullet and had a dash at being airy.
"Oh, well, tra-la-la!" I said.
"Precisely, sir," said Jeeves.
Kipling: Where's your sense of humor?
Rebis: We're working on reconstructing it ...
What is a "canty day", Dennis?'
'I've never troubled to ask. Something like hogmanay, I expect.'
'What is that?'
'People being sick on the pavement in Glasgow.'
'Oh.
Chimes?" Phyllis asked. "Chimes to call a lover? Chimes with the voice of a bird trapped in them? Chimes that play you whatever song you most desire to hear?"
"No thanks," said Nick. "We've got MTV.
Your words hurt, Jazz. They hurt like cotton balls thrown in my direction.
Why are you so weird?" "Because my weird has to be able to cancel out your weird, Lady Cross-stitch." "At least what I do is considered an art form," Chubs said. "Yes, in ye olde medieval Europe you would've been quite the catch -
Jeeves."
"Sir?"
"Are you busy just now?"
"No, sir."
"I mean, not doing anything in particular?"
"No, sir. It is my practice at this hour to read some improving book; but, if you desire my services, this can easily be postponed, or, indeed, abandoned altogether.
Woe to he who checkmates his opponents at last, only to discover they have been playing cribbage.