Discover the most popular and inspiring quotes and sayings on the topic of Quack. Share them with your friends on social media platforms like Facebook, Twitter, or your personal blogs, and let the world be inspired by their powerful messages. Here are the Top 100 Quack Quotes And Sayings by 88 Authors including David Mitchell,Cassandra Clare,Robyn Peterman,Jack Dempsey,Kevin Hearne for you to enjoy and share.

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My voice was jus' a duck fart in a hurrycane.
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I shall never eat duck again. I cannot believe I used to like duck. The duck betrayed me.
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Cockmotherhumpershitpissbodoinkeewacker,
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Honey, I just forgot to duck.
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a misbegotten cockwaffle.
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But what is quackery? It is commonly an attempt to cure the diseases of a man by addressing his body alone. There is need of a physician who shall minister to both soul and body at once, that is, to man. Now he falls between two stools.
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Never trust a duck.
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You know on TV when there's one of those awkward, shocking moments and all you hear are the crickets in the background?
Well chirp fucking chirp ... this is one of those moments.
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The perils of duck hunting are great - especially for the duck.
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As an old acquaintance of mine used to say, "If you can't duck it, fuck it." I'm pretty sure he knew it was duct and not duck, but I'll forgive him for the sake of the rhyme.
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The pig says oink.
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A duck walks into a bar and the bartender asks, what'll it be? The duck doesn't answer because it's a duck.
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Queer Ducks flock together.
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Life is just too short to go quail hunting with the wrong people.
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The thing was, Qhuinn felt like he wanted to explain things. Unfortunately, and unlike his slut cousin, Saxton the Cocksucker, he had no gift with words.
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He had a bushy unibrow that could house a family of quail.
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Before you attack the porcupine, think of its quills!
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Geep,' whuppled the parrot.
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The empiric easily degenerates into the quack. He does not know where his knowledge begins or leaves off, and so when he gets beyond routine conditions he begins to pretend-to make claims for which there is no justification, and to trust to luck and to ability to impose upon others-to "bluff."
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Quip fast, die young.
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The wise duck keeps his mouth shut when he smells frogs.
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Rat is a lot like duck, except with a wonderfully nutty flavor.
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The world of the quark has everything to do with a jaguar circling in the night.
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It was as if a man should have jumped out of a frying pan into - a duckpond.
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Cecy, help me to collect the ducklings, and put them back into the box! If we were to place your muff on top of them they will very likely believe it to be their mother, and settle down!
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Quin took on the air of someone who has just realized it's time for the yearly visit to the spinster great-aunt in a desperate attempt to woo her inheritance away from her thirty-eight cats.
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To listen is an effort, and just to hear is no merit. A duck hears also.
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A shoat squealing under a fence just attracts the fox, when it should be trying to run.
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Lumpyface Lumpyhead
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How to explain? How to describe? Even the omniscient viewpoint quails.
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I've always wanted to kick a duck up the ass.
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Squee-squee-squawky-squiggly-squee.
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Never trust a duck - Will Herondale
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Was that you or the duck?
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Music must be listened to; it is not enough to hear it. A duck hears also.
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If you think a quaterhorse is that ride in front of Kmart.. You might be a rednneck
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There was a bird whistle as Polly neared the hiding place. She identified this one as the sound of the Very Bad Bird Impersonator ...
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Cogg would suddenly stand stock still. "Listen," he would say. Some feeble quack would be heard from the willow beyond the pond. "That's an easy one to tell. The frog-pippit." Then he would add, As a safety measure, "As I believe they call it in these parts."
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There is actually quite a lot of crossover between the quacks and drug companies. They use the same tricks and tactics to bamboozle people into buying their pills, but drug firms can afford to use slightly more sophisticated versions.
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Charlie Asher: Mrs. Ling, is that duck wearing trousers?
Mrs. Ling: Could be ... You hear of paper-wrap chicken? This duck in pants.
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Cor, love a duck. And also Lawks-a-mercy. I said that inwardly, but outwardly I said, Blimey, and also, what larks.
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Death strode away, stopped, and came back. He pointed a skeletal finger at The Duck Man.
WHY, he said, ARE YOU WALKING AROUND WITH THAT DUCK?
"What duck?"
AH. SORRY.
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People eat duck and you think, well, we've got loads of chickens, leave the ducks alone!
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So you're the Pigeon, huh?"
"No," I snapped. "I have a name."
He seemed amused at the way I regarded him, which only served to make me angrier.
"Well? What is it?" he asked.
I took a bite of the last apple spear on my plate, ignoring him.
"Pigeon it is, then," he shrugged.
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And with that he began to laugh, not a laugh either, but a cackle, a hideous cackle like a rooster with its head on the block. It got him so badly that he had to stop and hold his guts; the tears were streaming down his eyes and between the cackles he let out the most terrible heartrending sobs.
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Oh Ducky!' said Johnny. 'Squeak to me!
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his snores sounded like ducks mating.
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Thought you could steal the pepper, did you?! Thought you could try darning my socks while I was asleep, did you?! I wanted those holes there, you little bastard! I wanted those holes there!" He throttled the duck and swung it up and down, whumping it on the table.
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No milk, gone out for breakfast, then to Hamleys, want to beat crowds. PS Know who killed Quine.
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Duck Dynasty viewers think they're the experts on hunting, but actually they're the hunted ones, just another dumb demographic to be captured, laughed at and force-fed commercials for Geico and Home Depot by the Smart People in New York and L.A.
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Duck-bill, n. Your account at your restaurant during the canvas-back season.
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Yo QT. r u there? I dart Kika a glance. "What does that mean? He called me a Q-tip?" Kika laughs and sits next to me. "Read it out loud. It will make more sense." "Yo-Q-T ru there. Q ... T ... ?" "Q
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Since when did you know anything about mimicking bird calls, Zoltan?' 'That's the whole point. If you hear a strange, unrecognisable sound, you'll know it's me.
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...I have a magical duck-kitten.
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Peter Piper pecked a peck of pick of peck of pickled pepper.
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Whenever you see me, I'm on antique quaaludes.
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They use everything about the hog except the squeal.
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Well, She's (She-Hulk) quippy. I'm quippy. When we get together, we quip. And, quipwise, I think that makes me a better quipper. -Spiderman
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Rache! Glad you're ... Tink loves a duck!" he said, wings clattering. "It stinks of sex in here. God, woman. I leave you alone for one night, and you're humping the ghost." - Jenks to Rachel
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Nothing is more despicable than a professional talker who uses his words as a quack uses his remedies.
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THE GRACKLE
The
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What is that smell? (Nick)
(It was like three-day-old cat vomit mixed with rotten asparagus.)
Duck urine. It keeps the zombies from thinking I'm human. (Mark)
Yeah, well it keeps me from thinking you're sane. (Nick)
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The resulting sound wasn't quite a squawk, wasn't quite a yelp, wasn't quite a gasp. As best she could describe it, it sounded like an angry chicken slapping a puppy with a fish.
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Bloodthirsty little beasts. Never trust a duck.- William Herondale
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The fine line between genius and madness is a punch line. Duck, you idiot!
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I scared a little porcupine
and caught a quill in my behind.
It hurt so badly in my tail,
but tugging on it made me yell.
The porcupine was still around,
so I complained. He simply frowned
and said, Stop whining! Look and see
how many quills are stuck on me!
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If it looks like a duck and sounds like a duck, it could be a really ugly swan.
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Ducking autocorrect!
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And that unusual squawking sound is actually the mating call of the the rare ... oh, it's just an oboe player.
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I shot a vein in my neck and coughed up a quaalude.
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The chicken thing let out a whispering cackle.
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I went to the butchers to buy a leg of lamb. "Is it Scotch?", I asked. "Why?" the butcher said in reply. "Are you going to talk to it or eat it?". "In that case, have you got any wild duck?". "No", he responded, "but I've got one I could aggravate for you."
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The Egyptian duck is a dangerous animal: one snap of its beak and you are infected with Egyptology for life.
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I'm sort of a strange bird.
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How about giving your old man a break here, huh, Chirp?"
"Chirp is dead," I hear myself say and watch the flat words destroy his pleasure. "You killed her, and now you have to deal with me because I'm what's left.
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You duck! You flying yellow duck! And you took this long to tell me?! When Sarah gets excited, random animals pop into her speech like she has an Old MacDonald Had a Farm kind of Tourette syndrome.
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She'd arrived a self-sufficient city woman, and now she was covered in snow, sitting on a bench beside a crazy person, and she had a duck on her lap. Who was nuts now?
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Fuck a duck! The asshole has a girlfriend. Great! Just great. Which makes me that woman. The other woman.
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Raucous quacking sounded in Firestar's ear. He jumped up, staring around wildly until he spotted a duck in the water beside the reed bed.
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Tuck in your tail, little duck.
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What was that shuck thing?" -Minho
"Magic goop that eat's people's heads, that's what it bloody was." -Newt
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I want my chirfugging goose back!
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And it's always better to check than be sorry," Quain added. "'It worked' could be code for the dead are invading."
"Wow, that's ... really random, Quain. Aside from you , who would ever put those two things together?
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John Kerry went duck hunting and he's doing that to fulfill his campaign pledge to hunt down the ducks and kill them wherever they are! Kerry did pretty well; he came back with four ducks and three Purple Hearts.
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Flapping my arms I began to cluck, look at me, I'm the disco duck.
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Three quarks for Muster Mark!
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I don't want to be a chicken. I don't want to be a duck. So I shake my butt.
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What does the fox say?
Ring-ding-ding-ding-dingeringeding!
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The behavior of the pigeon
is beyond reproach,
but the mountain cuckoo?
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Have you heard a cuckoo yet?" I asked Steapa. "Not yet." "It's time to go," I said, "unless you want to kill me?" "Maybe later," Steapa said, "but for the moment I'll fight beside you." And
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A pasty costly-made, Where quail and pigeon, lark and leveret lay, Like fossils of the rock, with golden yolks Imbedded and injellied.
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Well, fuck a duck.
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I had a quack in the floor. So, I had to use ductile.
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What exactly is the function of a rubber duck?
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Ree sat chilled inside her squat tent. To occupy her mind, she decided to name all the Miltons: Thump, Blond, Catfish, Spider, Whoop, Rooster, Scrap ... Lefty, Dog, Punch, Pinkeye, Momsy ... Cotton, Hog-jaw, Ten Penny, Peashot ...
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Whistle a birdcall. The mockingjay cocks its head and whistles the call right back at me. Then, to my surprise, Pollux whistles a few notes of his own. The bird answers him immediately.
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They say that hens do cackle loudest when there is nothing vital in the eggs they have laid.
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My dear Mama, you are definitely the hen who hatched a famous duck.
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The white Aylesbury duck is, and deservedly, a universal favourite. Its snowy plumage and comfortable comportment make it a credit to the poultry-yard, while its broad and deep breast, and its ample back, convey the assurance that your satisfaction will not cease at its death.
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No animal likes to be pecked on the anus by a duck.